It's not love, it's Gravitation
by IamAGreekLeaf
Summary: When Tatsuha Uesugi, Captain of the USS Thunderbird, received his new orders, he didn't imagine that the same would bring some ghosts from his past and old passions. SLASH
1. Prologue

**Fandom:** Gravitation x Star Trek (2009)

**Shipper: **Tatsuha x Ryuichi

**Genre: **Drama, Comedy, Romance, Adventure, Sci-Fi

**Warnings: **PG-16

**Disclaimer: **Gravitation belongs to Maki Murakami while Star Trek (2009) to JJ Abrams and Cia.

* * *

**PROLOGUE**

When Tatsuha received his new orders that morning, he was expecting everything to come out of Admiral Williams' mouth, everything but that. And because of that, nobody could blame him if the only reaction he had after what he heard from the man was to blink repeatedly like the gesture was enough to make his brain catch the meaning of the Admiral's words.

"Excuse me sir. But what did you say?" Admiral Williams rolled his eyes and let out an annoyed sigh. He never liked to repeat himself and the man knew that Tatsuha understood his words very well but was playing dumb.

"The high command gave the order for the _Thunderbird_ to come back to Earth with the mission to transport a civilian group to the colony T-003." T-003 was one of the Earth's colonies so it wasn't unusual for a star-ship to be ordered to travel to one of them to bring supplies or to offer medical assistance from six to six months. But the problem was that, usually, the star-ships used to do this kind of mission were diplomatic ships or flagships_. _Not a destroyer like the _Thunderbird. _And it was this that was confusing Tatsuha who opened his mouth to ask why he was ordered to do this mission and not the _Sampson_ or even the Star Fleet's beloved _Enterprise. _She was the Fleet golden girl together with her poster boy Captain James Kirk, but he changed his mind about the question when he saw the Admiral frowning, doing a face that clearly was saying that the man was loosing his patience.

"As you wish sir."

"We are waiting for you in three days Captain."

"Yes sir."

"Williams out." And with that the Admiral's face disappeared from the screen at the same time that Tatsuha pushed the button to cut out the connection and picked up his PADD to see glowing on its surface a new massage with his new instructions.

With a long sigh, Tatsuha pressed his fingertip on the screen to open the message, with his face loosing all its color because of the words that he was reading on the PADD. Because there, in underlined letters, it was saying that his new mission was to transport a civilian group to T-003. A group that the Admiral conveniently forgot to tell him that it was two of the most famous bands around the Earth together with their producer, manager, wife and boyfriend of some of its members. And okay, normally this wouldn't constitute as a reason for Tatsuha to panic, but the problem was that half of the people in that group he hasn't seen for ten years.

Because his new orders were to be the private limo for Bad Luck and Nittle Grasper.

Damn it!


	2. Chapter 1

**CHAPTER 1**

The reason why Tatsuha enlisted in the Star Fleet was simple: he wanted to escape. Escape from his mundane life, his pathetic world, but, most importantly, to run away from his family. Okay that when he took this decision the last reason was the one on the top of his mind list because at the time he was angry, was hurt and with a great will to throw everything away and scream 'fuck the world, I'm out of here', but at the same time he was scare shitless. To where would he go if he left everything he had behind? Run to his siblings searching for shelter he couldn't because they were the reason for all his frustration. His father, hunf, don't let Tatsuha start with his father. The old man didn't care for the boy's problems and he didn't have any other relative who he could ask for help. Not even friends.

But then all his answers came when he accidentally saw an ad when he was surfing on the internet. An ad that was saying all the advantages that a person could have if they enlisted on the Star Fleet and served under the Federation. Tatsuha had to confess that he had to think a lot before he took the first plane to San Francisco because he never saw himself as a military man, following orders without any complaint. Just because he was the kind of guy that always hated any authority figure.

But that opportunity was gold because he needed to get away, to prove to everyone that he wasn't only a teenager obsessed with a band without any other purpose in life and who his brother and sister couldn't barely tolerate and were always saying that he needed to grow up, to mature. So, with this in mind, he put the most precious things he had in a travel bag and left the house in the middle of the night without saying goodbye to anyone, embarking in a nightly flight to the USA. Obviously that Tatsuha's father was the first one to call to his cell phone (ironically hours after he left) only to scream at him and demand to know where he was. And everything that Tatsuha did was to tell the old man that he was growing up like they wanted him to do and shut the cell off before the man could say anything else. Mika was the next to call to ask if he lost his mind and that to run away from home was the most childish thing she ever saw. Again Tatsuha ended the call before she could say anything else. Eiri was the last, but instead of calling he sent a text message that only said that he was a coward. Tatsuha snorted with rage.

He wasn't being a coward, only moving on. Coward was Eiri who insisted to stick to his past and his traumas and was incapable to get over it to see the good things that the life gave to him. He had a career, did what he liked, that was write, his work was well known around the world and he had a boyfriend completely devoted to him. Even if Eiri treated Shuichi like scum. For Tatsuha, leave wasn't the coward way, but a way for him to take control over his life. And, surprisingly, between everyone who called him before, Tohma was the only one who was completely understandable about his decisions. He was the only one that first listened to Tatsuha's reasons to say in the end:

"If this is what you want I won't oppose to you. Good luck Tatsuha." And this was the last direct contact that he had with the entrepreneur, because the years that followed this call and while Tatsuha was in the Academy, he only sent text messages to Tohma only to say that he was alright and alive, but to not tell anyone where he was. Specially to his family. He thought that they wouldn't approve his choices or, at least, mock him because of it.

Tatsuha didn't have a genius level IQ like most of the cadets in the Academy, he was smart and that was only that. When he arrived at the Academy he didn't have any idea of what career he would follow and for a couple of weeks he got completely lost in a routine that was so different from what he was used. The classes were very weird for him, talking about things he only saw in movies or documentaries. And some of the times Tatsuha had a few panic attacks when he thought that he would never be able to fit in and when the Academy realized that they would kick him out without thinking twice. But then he met his mentor, Commander J'hon, and the man (or alien, whatever) was the one who put Tatsuha on the right path.

In the end they found out that the young man had a knack for leadership, a talent that was repressed for years because of his family. Between a very bossy sister, a demanding father and a brother full of complexes, when Tatsuha would have the opportunity to show said qualities? With that the boy was forwarded to the program to train officials in command and that was the start of Tatsuha's career in the Star Fleet. At eighteen years of age Tatsuha enlisted himself in the Fleet, at twenty two he graduated and months later took his first trip through the Space as an officer in the _USS Akira_. At twenty five he became a senior officer with a specialty in combat in the _USS Farragut _(before the ship be destroyed in Nero's attack) and at twenty seven years of age, because of Nero's attack that resulted in the diminished of half of the Fleet, they gave to Tatsuha the command of the recently built combat ship _USS Thunderbird_, making him the second youngest officer to receive the post of Captain in a star ship.

Obviously that such accomplishment should be celebrated, what Tatsuha did with the friends he got in the years in the Academy, with most of them about to serve under him in the _Thunderbird_, but not with his family. His family, with the exception of Tohma, didn't have any idea of where he was and if Tatsuha was still the rebel teenager from years ago, he would have sent a very smug message telling them about his new status, only to have the pleasure to feel superior to the ones who thought that he wouldn't be capable to be great in life if he insisted to act like a child and nurture a childish crush on Ryuichi Sakuma. But he didn't send the message. First because he wasn't a teenager anymore, but a grown up man with a perfect military file, a Captain, who was more mature and sure of himself then years before. And second because the past, differently of what Eiri thought, was made to be kept in the past.

But now, years later, he received that order.

"Commander Hope?" Tatsuha said when he pressed the button on the computer's control panel inside his cabin, patching him through directly to the bridge and to Commander Adam Hope, his First Officer and also best friend since the Academy.

"This is Hope."

"Change the course to Earth in warp three." He said. At least Williams' order had its positive side: would take them out from that damn Neutral Zone that they were patrolling for weeks with nothing new happening inside of it.

"Can I ask why sir?"

"We just received an order from the Fleet saying that we have to transport a group of civilians." Tatsuha couldn't see Adam's face right now, but he knew the man well enough to know that Hope would be pulling a face while asking himself why the Flee was sending them, a combat ship, to do the job instead of another – and more suitable – kind of ship. Maybe was because that since Nero's attack two years ago the Fleet was reduced to half of its number and most of the new ships were still in shipyards around the Earth, months from being finished. Or it was because the _Thunderbird_ was floating without doing nothing in that Neutral Zone, or simply because the Admirals liked to mock with their face. Whatever was the reason, orders were made to be followed, not questioned, at least not much.

"The course was changed sir." Adam's voice came from the communicator.

"Okay. Uesugi out." And with that Tatsuha finished the call and relaxed a little on his chair, pondering what would be the result of this mission and hoping that the same would be easy and without any complications.

**oOo**

When the idea came for Nittler Grasper do a tour together with the Bad Luck in human colonies that belonged to the Federation, Tohma didn't think that the production would be so great. In the last ten years the Bad Luck became one of the most famous band around the world and, maybe, across the Universe if the proposition made by the big shots from the entertainment industries around the globe was any give away about the size of Bad Luck's success. A kind of success that only the Nittle Grasper had achieve before and kept it until nowadays. So it seemed that the Bad Luck wasn't a simple rival, that could easily be destroyed, anymore. Now they became a real threat. But that was okay, because Tohma loved to deal with threats, they made his life more exciting. They made everything more exciting. When you have someone that could take you out from your pedestal, you would fight to death to stay there, try harder to become better, to become the best of all. Because of that, while Bad Luck's popularity was growing, Nittle Grasper fought harder to surpass the threat and they shined like a star in its full capacity and were still shining until the present day and beyond. And Ryuichi? Well, this one became even more paranoid for perfection when he saw that the public had a new _bishounen_ to love.

It's not that Ryuichi lost his charm or charisma after so many years. On the contrary, his taurian genes helped him a lot. The inhabitants from the planet Tauron were well known for their beauty, vanity and longevity. Everything that Ryuichi was and a little more. And Tohma did suspect that, maybe, Shuichi also had some ancestor inside the race if the boyish face and the competitiveness that grew in the singer along the years were any indication. So, after a day with long business reunions, closed deals and plans for the tour schedule, Tohma said goodbye to the others entrepreneurs with a smile on his face when he realized that he was one step closer to spread the success of the two most profitable bands working under his record label.

But then came the problem: the attack that the Federation received two years before shook the way of work in all the space's routes used by everyone, what put a risk in the tour's plans. Flights between the planets and the colonies were monitored closely by the Federation because the destruction of half of the Star Fleet's ships opened a gap in the security that was being used by some spacial pirates and others opportunists. Many companies were avoiding to cross some points in the Space and not even a chartered flight would risk to go through the places in the tour's map. Everything was about to be kept only in contracts and ideas when K Winchester presented a solution.

The good and old solution where he knew someone in some important place who would be able to solve this problem for them. The crazy American only forgot to tell that this someone was a senior Star Fleet officer who, coincidentally, had two daughters who were Nittle Grasper and Bad Luck's fan and who lived in one of the colonies inside the tour's schedule. So it was because of that that him offered one of the Star Fleet's ship to take them to their first stop that would be the colony T-003. And for Tohma it was okay, he even felt a little bit flattered to travel in a star ship. The problem started when the man saw the ship's name in the schedule. _USS Thunderbird_. And it was then that he knew that Tatsuha would kill him, probably using all the tricks that he learned in the Academy.

"Something wrong, Tohma?" The blonde blinked and turned to see Eiri, with the most bored expression that a person is capable to put on their face, sitting beside him while they were at the space port waiting for the ship that would take them to the spacial dock where the _Thunderbird_ was waiting for them. The writer was traveling with them after he received from his publisher some well earned vacation because of the long months that he spent going around the world to the premieres of the movie 'Gravitation'. A motion picture based on Eiri's recent best seller. One that the critics said was the best of all the writer's work. Mika was traveling with them because she never went to the Space before and was using the opportunity to do it for the first time.

"No, everything is fine." Fine until the moment when they put a foot in the _Thunderbird_. And Tohma was praying for the ship to be big enough so them won't be able to meet Tatsuha inside of it. After all, he was the Captain, a busy man. So what were the chances for them to cross paths?

"TOHMA!" The scream brought Tohma back to earth, as like the body that launch itself over the blonde man and robed him of all his air. Another thing typical from then taurians was that they never took the life seriously. And why would they do that? Take Ryuichi for example, who even being a half-blood, inside of his mother's race, he was still a young adult instead of the middle aged man that according to the date of his birth he was supposed to be, but not according to his body and face. Maybe was because of that that the singer acted like a child sometimes. Because only now, according to the taurians, that the man reached the adulthood, even if mentally Ryuichi was mature enough because of his human side but preferred to not show that because of his alien genetic. Something that he explained about trying to show to his fans a personality that they were expecting to see that matched with his pretty face. A personality that helped with the Nittle Grasper's popularity. So for Tohma, if the team was winning he wouldn't change the players yet. But right now they were between friends, friends who knew that such attitude coming from Ryuichi was totally fake, so the singer can stop to pretend at least for two minutes for Seguchi's sanity.

"Hey Ryuichi." Tohma greeted his friend with a small smile. He didn't belong to a race of Peter Pans, he was human and even if he took a good care of himself, even if physically he didn't seem to have the age that he actually had, even then he was getting old enough to not be capable to stand Ryuichi's body every time the same slams against his. And he lost the count of how many times remembered Ryuichi about that only for minutes later get another bone crushing hug.

"Can you believe it? A ship from the Fleet. The STAR FLEET!"

"Yes, I believe." Tohma said with another small smile and added with a whisper: "And I'm dead."

"You don't seem so excited." Eiri commented when he saw his brother-in-law's face.

He knew Tohma very well to be sure that in a good they the blonde would be extremely smug just because he got a ride in a Star Fleet's ship while being a simply commoner instead of an ambassador or a politic (the kind of people who usually get a star ship as a private transportation). Instead, he seemed to be very apprehensive.

"Are you afraid to fly?" Tohma only looked at Eiri with arched eyebrows. That was a stupid question. He flied enough in his life to have lost any fear years ago. But he wasn't able to say that to the writer because at that exact moment a flight attendant approached them and said that their flight to the spacial station was ready to go. With that, Nittle Grasper and Bad Luck were guided to the platform where the space ship was waiting for them, with Shuichi already attached to Eiri's arm and talking a mile per minute, the same thing that Ryuichi was doing with Tohma under everybody's else amused look.

Minutes later all of them were inside the space ship that was going through the atmosphere and reaching the Space, with Ryuichi and Shuichi with their face against the windows to watch the black mantle that was the Universe like two impressionable children. Tohma took a deep breath when the transporter turned a corner, letting them see the spacial station floating around the planet but, more specifically, the spacial dock where a star ship was reflecting in an amazing way the station lights. A star ship where it was written on its hull: _USS Thunderbird_ along with the identification number: _NCC-64556. _Now they were entering an unknown territory and Seguchi only hoped that the next week will be a calm one, because he was also too old to be stressed because of the dysfunctional family that he had.


	3. Chapter 2

Usually a trip to T-003 would take four days on warp two. But in _Thunderbird_'s case, it would take agonizing seven days because of the order to go to the spacial port fourteen to get some supplies that should be taken to the colony. Meaning that Tatsuha had to find a way to be incognito to the ship's new guests for the next week. Starting right now when he received the message that the transportation ship that was bringing the two bands had just arrived inside the hangar. Obviously that the rules and etiquette said that the ship's Captain should be the one to welcome the guests, but the self preservation instincts made Tatsuha freeze on his chair and send to his pilot, First Officer and best friend, Adam Hope a pleading look. The one who knew every dirt secret in Tatsuha's past as also knew the problems that he had with his family and why he joined the Fleet.

"You own me. A big one." The man grumbled in Tatsuha's ear when he passed by him to the turbo lift.

"I love you too!" Was Tatsuha's answer while he gave the pilot his best and biggest boyish smile, what made Adam roll his eyes.

Through the cameras, Tatsuha saw when the transporter entered the hangar and minutes later Adam arrived in the place at the same time that the small ship landed on the metallic floor and its doors opened. The first one to get out of the ship was Tohma, followed by Mika, what made Tatsuha tense. The young Captain was hoping that the wife traveling with the bands was Nakano's wife, who he knew married Ayaka some years ago, not his sister. Next came Shuichi dragging a very surly Eiri (no news on that front), followed by K, Noriko, Suguru and Sakano. And last came Ryuichi who practically cannon balled himself out of the ship.

"Wow, he didn't change a bit with the years." Maria Solomon, the _Thunderbird_'s Chief Communications Officer, commented when she saw the singer on the video screen that she brought online for the Captain.

"Rumors say that he is half taurian." One of the bridge's science officers said.

"Who cares? Nittle Grasper and Bad Luck are on board and this is awesome. Do you think that they will mind to take a picture?" Somebody said and this last comment made Tatsuha get up from his Captain chair and look around to everyone in the bridge, seeing that there was a curious expression in some of his officer's face.

"Let's make something clear here: they are our guests and must be treated with respect. If they ask for privacy they will be listened. What we have on board of the _Thunderbird_ are Star Fleet's officers, not a bunch of teenagers harboring a silly crush. You'll act according to your position and will pass this message along." A chorus of 'yes sir' echoed through the bridge and seconds later everyone went back to their work, ending any parallel conversation.

But for Tatsuha this wasn't enough and he let out a sigh because he was already foreseeing that that would be a long, very long, week.

**oOo**

Adam had to confess that after a week floating in the Neutral Zone with nothing else to do besides look to the Space and the stars, the new orders from the Fleet would bring some emotion for the _Thunderbird_'s crew. And he came to this conclusion in the minute that the transporter's door opened up and the group got out from the ship in his direction, chatting with each other and some of them laughing of anything that their friend had said. Hope wasn't very tuned with the music world, he was a man who likes to move, of sports, full stadiums and teams going against each other, but this didn't stop him from recognize the musicians who were part of the Bad Luck and Nittler Grasper 'cause he dated a girl who was fan of both bands. And, obviously, that the first one he recognized was Ryuichi Sakuma just because of the stories that Tatsuha told him when they were freshly enlisted cadets and new roommates in the Academy.

Hope also identified Eiri Yuki and Mika Seguchi. How he couldn't identify them when they looked like so much with his Captain, specially Eiri, with the only difference being that Tatsuha had short black hair and eyes at the same color. If he didn't know better he would think that the brothers were twins instead of the six years of age that put both apart. Tohma Seguchi was also familiar to Adam 'cause he was the only family member with who Tatsuha still had some contact, also the blond musician seemed very relieved when he saw that it was Adam the one who showed up to welcome them. Hope wanted to smile, but it would spoil all the stereotype that the civilians had of military people: serious, dedicated and who follow orders without complain.

"Welcome to the _Thunderbird_." Adam's rough voice made everyone stops abruptly all the conversation and Ryuichi and Shuichi's eyes widened when they saw the pilot. Adam Hope was a man whose presence was hard to ignore. With mocha color skin, cropped black hair, amber eyes, big shoulders and a height above of six foot, it was hard to pass by him without giving him a second glance. "I'm Commander Hope and I'll be your guide for today."

"Shouldn't the Captain be the one to welcome us?" Mika asked with arched eyebrows and Tohma wished that the metal floor opened right now and swallow him because he had noticed the second that his eyes fell on the Commander that Tatsuha was smart enough to not show up at the hangar. And now Mika was questioning why was that without knowing the truth behind this.

"The Captain is at the moment in a reunion and asked me to apologize to you in his behalf and say that he'll make up to you later. Now, if you like to follow me." Adam knew that Tatsuha would peel of his skin to make jackets because of the opening that he put in his speech, allowing the guests the opportunity to talk with the Captain later and to meet and discover who he was. But Hope would deal with one problem at the time. And now his priority was to be the babysitter of a bunch of rock stars. Joy.

**oOo**

"I'll make up to them later?" Tatsuha growled to Adam when he dragged the pilot to his cabin after the end of the alpha shift. "Is the lack of oxygen in the Space finally affecting your common sense?"

"Come on! What the worse can happen?" Adam asked with amusement in his voice while Tatsuha was looking at him like he lost his mind.

"Did you forget all the stories that I told about my family?"

"That was ten years ago, Tatsuha. Ten years ago you were a teenager who didn't have where to drop dead and supporting the group 'rebels without a cause'. Today you are a man, a Star Fleet's Captain, and you have a cause."

"Okay. How about the fact that I left without saying goodbye to anyone..."

"You said goodbye to your brother-in-law."

"Uesugis are famous to hold a grudge against a person like... forever."

"You don't seem to resent your family, only reluctant to meet them."

"I evolved. Buddha's teaching. You know what is like." Adam rolled his eyes.

"Buddha's teaching my ass. You are afraid of a confrontation, but what could happen? Your sister scream at you? Your brother look at you with disappointment in his eyes? Look at the bright sight, if they try to hit you, you can always throw them in the prison for being disrespectful with an authoritative."

"Yeah, if you look for this side."

"Or you are afraid because you finally have a chance to get closer to your beloved Ryuichi Sakuma?" Adam joked and Tatsuha had to stop himself to not throw a PADD on the officer's head. The joke about Tatsuha's crush on Ryuichi Sakuma when he was a child lost its appeal years ago. Like any other teenager, Tatsuha grew up and left childish crushes in the past. So he wasn't afraid to meet Ryuichi Sakuma. Actually, he wasn't even curious to know the singer. The Nittle Grasper, even if was annoying to admit and have to agree with his siblings, was just a phase. A phase that left good memories of his childhood but it passed.

"I hate you."

"No you don't. If wasn't for me you wouldn't have survived the Academy." Tatsuha rolled his eyes with Adam's arrogance. He hated when his friend was right. Not on the surviving bit, but on the lack of negative feelings towards the pilot. They were good friends, best friends, practically brothers, and that he would never deny. "And just for you to know: Nittle Grasper and Bad Luck would like to dinner with the Captain today to thank him for the trouble he is having because of them. You know, all this thing of being the private limo for two hit bands."

"Adam..."

"And I told them that you would love to accompany them in a dinner. So they are waiting for you at seven o'clock in the officer's hall." Seven o'clock? Tatsuha looked at the clock on his work desk that was showing that it was 18:45 pm, Earth time.

"Now I really hate you." He growled again, taking out his shirt, following with the boots and pants, grabbing the first clean towel he found and running to the bathroom. If he was going to dinner with music legends, at least he would like to be presentable.

**oOo**

The officer's hall usually doesn't see a living soul because the Captain and company liked to take their meals in the crew's mess hall, but that night it was opened and tidied to receive the very special guests inside the ship. Ryuichi's eyes widened when he got into the room and saw that the same had a big window in one of its walls where everybody could see the Space passing by like a blur, the same kind of visual that you get when you are driving a car at high speed on a freeway. Tohma looked around, a little apprehensive, and after that he thanked the Ensign who guided them to the room and let out a small sigh when he saw that they were the firsts to arrive. Shuichi promptly run to the table where was displayed some appetizers, dragging Eiri with him while Noriko, Surugu and Hiroshi started a small conversation in a corner. K and Sakano were exchanging some ideas about the tour at the table where the dinner would be served and Mika, when she saw how her husband was particularly quiet and very pale, approached him and touched his shoulder, getting his attention.

"You've been acting weird lately." Tohma raised an eyebrow to his wife. "Since you heard that K got us a Star Fleet's ship to take us to T-003." Wrong, he was acting weird since he heard the name of the ship that would take them to T-003. If was any other ship he wouldn't be closer to faint in any second. One thing was to face follow entrepreneurs, sharks in the business world like him, another thing was to face Mika's fury. This one was unprecedented. Perhaps if he put all the cards on the table now said fury would be a little less on the killing side.

"Mika." Tohma put his hand over his wife's on his shoulder, intertwining their fingers and turning around to look into her eyes. "We need to talk." He said in a tone that Mika knew he was being serious, because it was the same tone that Tohma used years ago when he told the woman about Eiri and Kitazawa. Mika felt a shiver run down her spine.

"About?" Tohma took a deep breath.

"Tatsuha." Her reaction with the name was in an instant. Mike let go of his hand like she had received a shock and gave her back to him.

Tatsuha's departure affected Mika more than the others members of the Uesugi family. Tetsuya just accepted that it was his destiny to see his children give him their back, leaving behind everything that he built without any consideration for his hard work. That's why when Tatsuha went away the man wasn't surprised, he only got angry for a while then later went back to his usual apathy. And what about Eiri? The writer's reaction was his usual contempt for the situation, something that didn't surprise Tohma who had to confess that half of Eiri's attitudes were his fault. He had spoiled the writer in a way that now he thinks that his problems are always bigger than everybody's else. And for a while Seguchi agreed with him until the day when the musician realized that Eiri was only using this as an excuse to not care. When he found out about that, Tohma got a new level of respect for Shuichi because the singer was still there, despite everything, he was still fighting to bring back an Eiri that existed in the past. An Eiri he didn't even met.

Mika, however, was the one most shocked with Tatsuha's departure. Because she was the one who fought teeth and nails to keep that family together, the one who took for herself the responsibility to be the mother when their mother died. Who thought that she was doing a good work raising the youngest only to find out that she was wrong. When Tatsuha left without saying goodbye, Mika screamed, fumed, cursed, used every way and another to find him without knowing that Tohma was the reason why all her clues ended in a brick wall. Tatsuha had explained the reason behind his leaving and Tohma understood him. He understood that the only way for the boy to stop being the irresponsible teenager that Mika and Eiri were always accusing him to be was to leave. And Seguchi supported Tatsuha on his decision and kept his secret and hugged Mika when the tears finally came when she realized, after a year, that she didn't have any chance to find her baby brother.

Maybe she would have persisted, but the fake messages that Tohma forwarded to her, editions of the originals that Tatsuha sent to him, calmed down the woman and made her go on with her life but not forget what had happened. But now she was about to find out the truth and that her husband always knew the exactly location of the Uesugi's youngest and never told her... Until now.

"I don't wanna know." Tohma sighed. Since she accepted that she would never find her brother, Mika acted like Tatsuha didn't exist anymore, what Tohma knew to be a lie.

"Yes, you want to know. In the last ten years that's what you want." The woman turned and sent a glare to her husband. "And this is the truth." Seguchi took a deep breath to get some courage, the same courage that ran away when the automatic doors opened and a familiar face entered the room.

"What is the meaning of this?" Eiri's surprised question reached the couple's ears and Mika turned on her heels and her eyes went large when she recognized the newcomer. Because there, under the door's sill, with arms crossed on his lower back and wearing the Fleet Captain's gold was...

"Tatsuha." Was the only thing that Mrs. Seguchi said before she fainted.


	4. Chapter 3

**CHAPTER 3**

Tatsuha was waiting for any reaction coming from his family when he finally met them, but that. Because at the moment he stepped inside the officer's hall, all he saw was Mika look to him with large eyes before they rolled inside her head and she went to the floor like a potato sack. Tatsuha reaction was instantly, one minute he was under the door's sill, in the other he was kneeling beside Mika and getting out his communicator, ready to give some orders.

"Uesugi to the sick bay, I need someone in the officer's hall ASAP!"

"I'm already sending someone, sir." His CMO promptly answered.

"So, Tohma, what's up? How are you doing?" Tatsuha asked as soon as he closed the communicator and put it inside his pocket. Tohma look from Mika's pale face, whose head was on his lap, to Tatsuha's grim smile, and gave the younger man an eye roll.

"Fine. And you?"

"Fine. So, Kenji... that's it?" Tohma nodded. "So, how is Kenji?"

"He's with my mother while we are on tour. He wanted to come, but the school isn't out yet, so you know how it is."

"Yeah, I know." And all the conversation ended there. After all, what else you could say to a person you haven't seen physically in the last ten years? And even if Tohma knew what was happening in his life, he didn't know all the little details, details that only a person who is living with Tatsuha day and night would know. Like Adam for example. Luckily, the tension around them didn't last long because Commander Joyce James, _Thunderbird_'s Chief Medical Officer, plus a male nurse got into the officer's hall with the doctor soon kneeling beside Mika and running a tricoder over her. When the machine beeped with the results, the doctor raised both her eyebrows, opened the medical bag she brought with her, got a hipospray out and without mercy injected it in Mika's neck. The result was immediately. As soon as the needle left Mika's skin, she opened her eyes and slapped Tatsuha hard on his face, what made Joyce and the nurse's eyes almost pop out from their face.

"How dare you?!" Mika screamed, pushing Tohma away from her and putting herself on her two feet. Soon Seguchi, Tatsuha and Joyce imitated her.

"Sir?" The CMO called the Captain in a whisper. After all, the crazy woman had just slapped him. Tatsuha just looked at the Commander and made a negative gesture with his head.

"Dismissed Commander."

"But sir...?"

"_Dismissed_!" He emphasized and Joyce just nodded, exchanged a look with the nurse and after that both left the room without saying anything else.

"Ten years. TEN years!" Mika pointed a finger to Tatsuha with her face getting redder by minutes. "And you knew!" And she turned her wrath to Tohma when she realized that it was about this that her husband wanted to talk about before the arriving of her supposedly missing brother.

"Yes, but Mika..."

"It was you!" Mika hissed in an accusatory tone. "It was you who fed my private investigators with fake clues. You knew what I was going through and even then you did nothing!" She barked.

"Mika, why don't we..." Tatsuha tried to appease her in vain.

"SHUT UP! You, you..." And with that she went to Tatsuha, starting to slap his chest with very word she was saying. "Annoying brat" Slap. "Irresponsible" Slap. "Insensitive" Slap. "Without any consideration" Slap. "Ungrateful." On the last accusation, Tatsuha had enough and when Mike raised her hands to give him another slap, he grabbed his sister wrists and pushed her away from him, almost making the woman have another meeting with the floor.

"I would measure your words if I was you Mrs. Seguchi, because you are offending a Star Fleet's officer." He said icily and the glare he was giving to her made Mika stop and reassess the man in front of her who was her brother. For years Mika had printed in her mind Tatsuha's teenager's picture, the last imagine that she had of him before he disappeared. But now, what was in front of her was a man. Tatsuha had grown up, he was taller than Eiri, had a athletic body, the body of a fighter, a military officer, the same body that was filling wonderfully the Captain's gold uniform, if the two straps in the shirt's wrists were any indication. The face she was looking now wasn't a boy's face anymore, but an adult's, with the shadow of a beard, serious expression, short dark hair and a slim line on the right eyebrow, a scar, that wasn't there on his teenager's years.

"It was here that you were hiding in the last ten years? In the Fleet?" Mika asked in a whisper, feeling like something was blocking her throat and her words. She had used everything she knew about her brother, every possible scenario, but she never thought that one day Tatsuha would leave home to join the military force. Be a Star Fleet officer never matched with Tatsuha's personality. Apparently, she was wrong. "And you always knew." She turned in to Tohma's direction, who nodded. "And didn't tell me anything. Why?" Tatsuha and Tohma glance at each other.

"Because Tatsuha asked me to." The musician said with a tired sigh. "When he left, each one of you called him and demanded that he came back, to stop with his childish actions and started to act like an adult. When I called him, I just asked why. And he told me. He explained everything and convinced me that that was the best and asked me for secrecy because we knew that the moment you found out the truth you would go after him and bring him back to Japan by his ears."

"I have to admit Tatsuha, if join the Fleet was a way to show us that we were wrong, you succeeded." For the first time since all that confrontation had begun, Eiri finally said something, grabbing Tatsuha's attention and making him turn to glare at his brother.

"I never wanted to prove anything, to _anyone._" His tone was drier than a Vulcan desert.

"So why did you do that?" Mika asked.

"My reasons are only mine and nobody's else."

"Tatsuha..." The woman started to said in a way that Tatsuha recognized as the way of an order about to come. But not today or ever again. He wasn't her very easy to manipulate baby brother anymore. So his answer for Mika's well known bossy intonation was to narrow his eyes and to promptly cut her.

"Mrs. Seguchi, please refrain yourself to give me any orders. You are not my superior officer and by the rules, inside _this_ ship, I am the _superior_ officer." Mika's shocked expression was so worth it. And okay, maybe he had lied to Adam, because to show to his family how far he got, for a minute, made him feel very good. He was human damn it! So what was the point of all his efforts to become what he became if he couldn't brag a little, specially to the people who thought that he would never reach so high in anything in his life.

Silence fell over everyone in that room after Tatsuha's harsh dismiss of this sister and everybody looked at each other without knowing what to do. That's it until Shuichi took a step closer to Tatsuha.

"It's good to see you again, Tatsuha." Shuichi said slowly, like he was trying to calm down a frightened animal. "I can hug, can't I?" Tatsuha raised an eyebrow, gave the singer a small smile and pulled him in a tight hug against his bigger body.

"I missed you Shuichi." He said against the dark brown locks, and Tatsuha thought it was weird to see that the singer didn't have the pink hair anymore. He would always think about Shuichi with a bright personality and a bright hair, even if the last one wasn't so color blinding anymore. As soon as he let Shuichi go, Hiroshi was the next to greet him. "Congratulations. I heard about you marriage with Ayaka." Nakano smiled and took a step back, letting Suguru be the next to say hi to Tatsuha. Eiri was the next after Suguru. But he only took a step closer, frowned and gave Tatsuha a pat on his shoulder before he returned to the same position he was before. Sakano, K and Noriko introduced themselves to Tatsuha, because they had heard about the missing Uesugi, but never had met him before. Tohma and Mika kept their distance and when the atmosphere inside the room became a little less tense, everybody realized that one person, in any moment, didn't participate in the greetings.

All eyes fell on Ryuichi who was still standing close to the observation window, with his big eyes fixed on the group around the Captain. Tatsuha shared a glance with Tohma, like asking his brother-in-law if the singer was alright, but Seguchi only shrugged. Tohma had gave up, years ago, to try to understand Ryuichi Sakuma's peculiarities.

"Mr. Sakuma." Tatsuha took a step closer to the singer, extending his hand to the other man. "It's a pleasure to meet you. I'm Captain Tatsuha Uesugi. Welcome to the _Thunderbird_."

Ryuichi didn't move a muscle for a couple of seconds, too busy staring in an uncomfortable way the man in front of him, until he blinked like he was getting out of a trance and extended his hand to receive Tatsuha's in a greet. The moment that their fingers touched the Universe stopped to move around them for a second and soon after it, was brought back to its axis by an electrical discharge that ran along their arms, making both of them to let go of each other as fast as the greeting started. A big and peculiar smile came to Ryuichi's face, one that Tatsuha didn't understand a bit, at the same time that the singer said:

"No Captain. The _pleasure_ is all mine."

**oOo**

Ryuichi had reached a level that was beyond excitation. The moment he heard from Tohma the plans about the joined tour with the Bad Luck in the Earth's colonies, the singer almost climbed the walls because of his animation. They would take the Nittle Grasper's magic to the Space, to beyond the Universe. Don't take him wrong, Sakuma had traveled before to outside the planet. After all, all his family from his mother's side still lived in Tauron, but visit a planet wasn't the same as visit a lot of planets. And even if the colonies were, actually, an extension of Earth, they had their own culture that most of the time was a cacophonic mix of most of Earth's culture that became one thing. And this was so exciting. Ryuichi loved to meet new places and new people. Be curious, an explorer and an innovator was part of his nature. And here we are talking about of his human side only .

So it was like an energy ball that he spent his last week, before they boarded to T-003, more excited than ever because they wouldn't go in a commercial flight, but in a Star Fleet's ship. STAR FLEET! The only time Ryuichi saw anything related to the Fleet was in a TV or when they passed by the Fleet's Academy in San Francisco and he saw all those cadets so neat in their red uniforms. But to see a star ship up close, be inside of one, not any civilian could say that they had the chance. So it was jumping and chattering a thousand words per second that he arrived to the space port to wait for the ship that would take them to the _Thunderbird_. Even the star ship's name that would take them was cool.

With his heart thundering in his ribcage, Ryuichi entered the transport ship after the flight attendant had said to them that their flight was ready to go. And with his face pressed against the window he saw the spacial station approaching slowly and letting his eyes see the marvelous _Thunderbird_'s hull.

When they finally entered the star ship's hangar, all Ryuichi wanted to do was to get out from that transporter and explore every corner of that place like an impressionable child. And then they finally landed and the space ship's door opened.

Jumping again, Sakuma left the ship and promptly stopped when Commander Hope's rough voice reached his ears, making his eyes pop when he saw the big man standing in front of the group. Adam Hope, like he had introduced himself, seemed to be capable to bring K down in a fight with only a flick of his fingers. Soon they started to follow Hope in a guided tour along the star ship, with the Commander showing to them the _Thunderbird_'s sectors and explaining what they did. In the end the tour finished when they felt the floor vibrate under their feet, and everyone got curious about what was happening, everyone but Hope.

"They activated the propulsion engine." Adam explained at the same time that the communication system in the ship came online and a disembodied voice announced that the _Thunderbird_ had just received the authorization to leave the dock and was ready to go to T-003 with a brief stop on the spacial port 14. And then they were being guided to the cabins which they would be staying during the trip with a message that the Captain would be honored to have them as a dinner guests at 19:00 pm, and that Hope would send someone to take them to the officer's hall.

Ryuichi screamed with happiness when his cabin's door closed at his back and his bright blue eyes looked to everything around him and his earlier feeling to explore all the ship (starting with the cabin) came back with vengeance. The place was nothing compared to the five star suites that he stayed before in hotels around the Earth, but it was a room inside of a star ship and this beat everything else. There was an on board computer attached to one of the walls, a single bed which was very narrow and it didn't seem to be very comfortable. The bathroom was also small, there was practically non existent furniture, only a work desk and a chair, but the engines' soft purr under his feet compensated everything else. Because it was this purr that was saying to him that he was inside of a _USS _and this was amazing. Sakuma always thought that if his love for the music wasn't so great he would have enlisted in the Fleet just for the joy to travel across the Universe, across a space where it doesn't exist any frontiers. This was the real meaning of freedom.

Excited, he ran to one of the luggage that some Ensign brought earlier to the cabin, starting to put out all the clothes inside of it in his frantically search for something to wear in this dinner with the Captain. Ryuichi giggled. Dinner with the Captain sound more like he was in a cruise instead of a combat ship and he was curious to meet this Captain of whom Mika talked about with such disdain because he wasn't there to welcome them. Commander Hope had smirked when he heard Mika's complains, like he knew the real reason behind the Captain absence, but everything was forgotten the moment the tour started. With a victory cry, Ryuichi found a pair of jeans and t-shirt that did wonderful things to his figure and bring out his eyes and ran to the bathroom to start all the required preparation.

At exactly 18:30 pm an Ensign pressed the cabin's doorbell and Ryuichi answered the door with a big smile on his face that make the poor boy who was going to escort him blush when he realized that he was in front of the famous Ryuichi Sakuma.

"I-I came to take you to the officer's hall Mr. Sakuma." The poor boy babbled with his face as red as a tomato and he couldn't stop the appreciative look he gave to the singer. Ryuichi's smile became bigger. The vanity so common in taurians was true. After all, why not brag when at 43 years old, Earth time, Ryuichi still had the face, body and health of a young man of 30? And he knew, better than anyone else, that nowadays was his face along with his talent that was helping to keep the Nittle Grasper on the top. Liar is the one who says that the appearance in the entertainment world wasn't so important as the talent.

"Show me the way then Ensign." Sakuma made a flourish with his hand and gave another charming smile to the young man, what made him stumble on his own feet before he started to walk along the corridor in the turbo lift's direction.

The route to the officer's hall lasted only five minutes and Ryuichi wasn't surprised when they stopped in front of the door and the Ensign extended a PADD for him and asked for an autograph, which the singer gave to him with another smile that made the young man blush again before he left almost bouncing with happiness. When he entered the room, Ryuichi practically flied to the big observation window where the Space was passing by like a blur. For some, the view wouldn't be that interesting, but for Sakuma it was like a master piece begging to be appreciated. The speed, the cacophonous colors, the purr coming from the engines, everything seemed to form a melody to be listened forever. A melody that made Ryuichi close his eyes for a moment, listening to it and forgetting about everything around him, forget about the others chattering, until Eiri's surprised voice reached his ears and made Ryuichi turn to see what was happening.

"What is the meaning of this?" Ryuichi's eyes went for the room's entry, to the man who the Uesugi siblings, plus Tohma and the Bad Luck, were staring with surprised expressions on their faces. And Sakuma was also surprised because never in all his life he met a man whose presence after entering in a room commanded everyone's attention and respect. And, obviously that, physically, the newcomer was an eye candy. Actually, in Ryuichi's opinion, the officer could make even the most beautiful taurian envy. Tall, dark and handsome, wearing a gold uniform with three strips on its wrists, showing how high was his rank inside that ship, it wasn't a wonder how the man was capable to catch everyone's attention over him. Pity that Mika didn't agree with Ryuichi's thoughts if her fainting when she put her eyes on the man was any indication.

The moment she went to the floor, the Captain soon reacted, going to the woman and calling a medical team with the communicator he seemed to have pulled out from a black hole because of how fast it appeared in his hands. While they waited for the team, the man seemed to chit-chat some thing or another with Tohma until a young doctor entered the room followed by a male nurse and examined Mika with her tricoder, injecting a hiposray in the fallen woman after she got the machine's results. With a jump, Mika woke up and slapped the Captain, making the doctor and nurse look shocked with what they witnessed, and after this they were dismissed by the man with a harsh order. And then, when the medical team left, the shit hit the fan.

Soon Mika was screaming accusations, some harsh words were said and some tears had fallen. Ryuichi, in the position he was, couldn't see the woman's face to say she was really crying, but her voice made it sound like that. Some explanations were given and soon the tension in the room diminished a little but didn't disappear. And after twenty minutes of war an agreement of hold fire was made and Shuichi stepped closer to the Captain and gave him a hug. Soon, one by one, the people in the room greeted the Captain while Ryuichi observed all the interaction with his heart beating like crazy inside his chest, with his skin tingling and his hands cold because of the sweat. And then he realized that everyone was looking at him while the stranger was coming in his direction with a small smile and an extended hand to Sakuma.

"Mr. Sakuma. It's a pleasure to meet you. I'm Captain Tatsuha Uesugi. Welcome to the _Thunderbird_."

The man's voice seemed like a sweet melody with the intention to lull Ryuichi and like in a trance he raised his own hand and touched the Captain's. The reaction was immediately. The moment their skin touched the Universe ceased to be a blur passing by the observation window, like the ship had suffered a sudden halt that lasted for a second because soon after this an electrical discharge ran along their arms, making them jump away from each other, and everything went back to normal. And Ryuichi knew the meaning of what happened, because he heard the stories from all his relatives from his mother's side, so he couldn't help the smile full of promises and mystery that came to his face when he answered the other man.

"No Captain. The _pleasure_ is all mine."


	5. Chapter 4

**CHAPTER 4**

Tohma knew that look. He knew it for thirty years since the day he bumped in a clumsy and skinny Ryuichi Sakuma inside their old school's corridor when they were just kids one step closer to reach the puberty. In Tohma's case before Ryuichi because the growing process of the other man was slower than a normal human being because of his taurian genes, the lucky bastard. But back to the subject, Seguchi knew that look and feared it immensely. It was the same look that Ryuichi get when he was close to put himself in a big mess that usually means that Tohma will spend a lot of money, time and a lot of work of his press office and lawyers to hide any problem recently caused by the rock star. It was the look of the cat that just caught the canary and the same was turned on Tatsuha's direction who was in the other side of the room talking to K. Apparently, the Captain and the blonde man had a lot in common now. Their knowledge of big guns for example.

"Don't even think about it." Seguchi hissed in Ryuichi's ear while he closed his fingers on his friend arm and pulled him with all his strength to a corner in the officer's hall where they could talk without interruptions.

"What?" Ryuichi answered with a big innocent smile on his pretty face.

"You like to make yourself seem dumb, but we all know that you are not. I know you Ryuichi Sakuma, for three decades, enough time to say that Tatsuha is too good for you." Sakuma's eyes almost popped out from its socks for a second and the man laughed. It was the first time he heard this sermon coming from Tohma's mouth being directed to him. Usually it was the opposite. Ryuichi Sakuma was too good for simple mortals and this made everything so much more interesting. What Tatsuha Uesugi had to make Seguchi so protective of him?

"What makes you think that I'm interested in him?"

"Maybe it was the fact that you spent all the dinner practically undressing him with your eyes just to catch his attention." Well, that was true.

Ryuichi spent the entry, main dish and dessert looking and trying to catch Tatsuha's attention for nothing. He almost got over the table, naked, and sang _Sleepless Beauty_ to see if the man finally presented him with a glance, even a single blink, but nothing happened. Very few knew, but taurians had a magnetic charm which got people's attention like a siren's song, but with less destructive effects. And usually it worked on people with a very weak psyche, or psyche null, what, apparently, wasn't the Captain's case. Because beside the half dozen of words he said to Ryuichi, he spent the rest of the dinner talking with the Bad Luck, trying to ignore Mika's glares, and was now in a very animated chat with K about military strategies and combats' scenarios.

"I'm just curious. It's the first person that I met who doesn't lick the floor for where I pass." Ryuichi joked.

For some people he would look like a very arrogant celebrity by just saying that. But after years in the entertainment world meeting people who were inclined to really lick the floor where Ryuichi stepped and after a lot of frustrated tries to make them stop and convince them he was like everybody else, Sakuma decided to sent everything to hell and thought it was better to joke about the situation than to try to make the people understand that he was also a mortal like them.

"Well, if you had met him ten years ago the scenario would be very different..." Tohma regretted his words the second they left his mouth, because Ryuichi looked at him with his bright blue eyes shining like two headlights.

"Explain."

"Ryuichi..."

"Just, satisfy my curiosity." Seguchi let out a long sigh, knowing that if Ryuichi didn't hear the truth by his mouth he would look for it in another place and probably would pester Tatsuha endlessly, something Tohma wouldn't want. No way.

"Tatsuha, when he was a teenager, he was your fan. A big fan, more than Shuichi."

And for Ryuichi this said something. When he met Shuichi, Ryuichi almost ran away from the other singer when he saw Shuichi's face shining in idolatry for Sakuma. And at that time he already thought that all that veneration for his persona was too much. Tatsuha then would make Ryuichi want to hide in some hole in the end of the world and never come back. Don't get him wrong, Ryuichi loved the attention, but everything that was too much get boring after some time and in other times scared the hell out of him.

"He was? He isn't anymore?"

"Do you see him screaming and asking for your autograph?"

"He's a Star Fleet's Captain. Probably must think that such attitude is embarrassing." Tohma snorted. Since when public humiliation stopped Tatsuha from doing something? Ryuichi didn't know half of it. As he didn't know Tatsuha.

"No. I know my brother-in-law. If he was still your fan, you would be the first to know. The Nittle Grasper was a phase from his childhood and teenager years. A phase he already got over it."

"And here I was thinking that I had some chance." Ryuichi joked and Tohma gave him an eye roll. Just to think that years ago the roles would be reversed, to think that years ago Tohma was the one trying to prevent that Tatsuha had any contact with Ryuichi, fearing what the younger man could do to the singer. Now the game was another and strangely bizarre.

"You don't have any chance because you're not really interested in him. For you he's just another quick fuck. You are vain Ryuichi."

"Ouch, that hurt."

"Vain, arrogant and thinks that your pretty face will get you inside Tatsuha's pants." Ryuichi's eyes went to said pants and how they embraced in a wonderful way the Captain's legs. Legs that Ryuichi thought would be a sign worth to see without anything covering it.

"Shouldn't be he the one to decide this?" Tohma rolled his eyes again and smirked to his friend.

"I know Tatsuha longer than you. He may have changed in the last ten years, but this is called 'growing up'. And I know that if he's not interested, he's not interested, it doesn't matter what you do."

"You wanna bet?"

"I don't bet if there isn't any real challenge behind it."

"What do you mean?"

"That whatever you are thinking or planning, you better give up. Because in the end, the only one who'll lose will be you." And with this last warning he left, returning to Mika's side and starting a whispered conversation with her.

Sakuma snorted, stopping himself from showing his tongue to his friend in a very childish way and soon after that his attention went to Tatsuha who just laughed of something K had said. The singer squinted his eyes and with a deep breath, combed his fingers through his dark hair and with a winning smile went in the Captain's and K's direction, ignoring the warning look Tohma gave him when he passed by the blond keyboardist. When he got close to the duo, he waited for them to recognized his presence, what took at least two minutes to happen.

"Something's wrong Ryuichi?" K asked with a friendly smile and Tatsuha only gave him a brief glance before he took a sip from his cup.

"I'm bored." Ryuichi declared with a small pout that made the American laugh before he scanned the room with his eyes. Noriko and Suguru were chatting about chords close to the buffet's table where half of the plates were empty now. Nakano and Sakano had given goodnight to everyone half a hour ago and left for their cabins while Shuichi and Eiri, after Shindou had pestered Tatsuha enough to get from the other man his authorization, went on a romantic tour along the _Thunderbird_ without knowing that in the second they put their feet out of the officer's hall, the Captain sent a message to all stations warning them about the couple's little walk and that any problem was to be reported to Tatsuha.

"Perhaps would be a good idea for you to retire as well." Winchester suggested and Ryuichi rolled his eyes.

"I'm bored, not tired." Ryuichi answered like a stubborn child. "So, Captain, it's there any entertainment in this ship?" He asked with an innocent smile while watching for Tatsuha's reaction.

"What would you define as entertainment Mr. Sakuma?" Ryuichi grimaced. Mr. Sakuma? Every time someone called him like that he invariably would look over his shoulder to see if his father wasn't behind him.

"What you define as entertainment Captain?" The flirting tone was soon caught by K's sharp senses but not by Tatsuha's.

"This is a combat ship, Mr. Sakuma, I believe that our definition of fun is very different."

K took a sip from his drink to hide the smile which was starting to blossom on his face. He knew Tatsuha from past rumors, stories he heard from Shindou and Seguchi, but he never had been introduced to the young man directly and of everything he heard, K had to confess that he had painted a different image of the youngest of the Uesugi clan. Something very different from the man in front of him. But, of course, the image he painted was of a teenager. Today Tatsuha was an adult. An adult that unconsciously dismissed Ryuichi Sakuma like he was nothing. Sakuma who was the most wanted bachelor according to the magazines, and Tatsuha didn't even notice it.

"You can't convince me that a crew of a thousand of people..."

"Six hundred and forty seven." Tatsuha corrected him and Ryuichi almost snorted. He didn't care how many people the ship had. He was only speculating.

"Okay. Anyway, you can convince me that a crew with so many people spend months confined in a closed space without nothing to entertain them."

"We have some shore leaves in some Space colonies for entertainment or Space ports. But as, for now, this option is not possible, we also have a recreation room on deck four. If you want, I can ask someone to escort you there." Now it was a beginning, Ryuichi thought while he took a step closer to Tatsuha, almost invading the Captain's personal space.

"And why can't be you, Captain, the one to accompany me?" He asked with a coquettish smile and put his right hand on Uesugi's uniformed arm. Tatsuha's dark eyes went from the hand on his arm to the singer's face and with a smooth move he stepped aside and took his arm from under the unwanted hand. K wanted to laugh. The dismissal was practically a punch in Ryuichi's pride and now the American was eager to know what the singer would do to be back on the game.

However, Sakuma didn't have time to re-evaluate his strategy and try another tactical approach, because the room's door opened at that moment to let through Commander Hope who went to Tatsuha, stopped beside the Captain and inclined his big body to whisper something in the brunette's ears. The Captain just nodded with a serious expression at the words said by his First Officer.

"Well gentlemen..." Tatsuha said when Adam took a step back. "It was a very pleasant dinner and the company was equally pleasant." His dark eyes went to every person in the room, staying longer on Tohma and avoiding Mika's glare. "But the duty calls me." He joked, putting his glass on the table. "K." Tatsuha acknowledge the blond man with a nod. "Mr. Sakuma." He said and before he could go, Ryuichi stopped him with a hand which again invaded the Captain's personal space and landed over his arm.

"It was a pleasure to meet you Captain." Ryuichi gave to Tatsuha his best charismatic smile. "And it's a pity that we had so few opportunities to talk. A problem that I hope will be remedied soon." Tatsuha just arched his eyebrows, gave the singer a positive nod and turned on his feet, getting out of the room as fast as he could, being accompanied by Hope.

As soon as the Captain left the officer's hall, Ryuichi's eyes met Tohma's across the room and the singer gave to his friend his best and bigger smug smile. Seguchi should know that when Ryuichi accepted a challenge, he accepted to win. Always.

**oOo**

"Ryuichi Sakuma..." Before Adam could finish the phrase, Tatsuha interrupted him.

"Shh, not here." He admonished the Commander. They were still in front of the officer's hall's door, which just closed. Soon Tatsuha started to walk, being followed closely by Adam, until they got inside the first turbo lift they found and Tatsuha pressed the button to his cabin's deck.

"Thanks for the help." Tatsuha said.

"Well, orders are orders." Adam joked and Tatsuha laughed.

He had gave to Adam the instructions for the Commander to rescue him from the dinner with his family after the dessert was served, hoping that he would survive long enough to them even with the indigestion caused by the heavy atmosphere around them during all the meal. Obviously that Adam laughed at the idea, but after he was informed by Joyce of what happened in the first minutes that Tatsuha got in the room where his family was, the First Officer thought that was his obligation to rescue the Captain earlier than planned and sent to Tatsuha a message asking if he didn't want for the mission to start ASAP. When Tatsuha answered saying no, that everything was under control, Hope relaxed and waited for the hours to pass by until it was the time to _save _the Captain.

Technically there wasn't any emergency that needed the Captain's presence. The Beta shift had just started a few hours ago and usually nothing big happened at this time of the night. But this was something only Tatsuha and him knew. So, a little white lie wouldn't hurt anyone, right?

"Now, serious Tatsuha." Adam pressed the turbo lift's emergency button and a second later a disembodied voice came through the machine's communicator.

"Something's wrong, Captain? Commander?" Obviously that someone would be monitoring the _Thunderbird_'s system and the fact that a turbo lift stopped abruptly between two decks would catch some security officer's attention.

"No." Tatsuha answered without giving any more explanations and when the little _ping_ indicating that the connection was closed reached his ears, he realized that the person on the other side of the line wouldn't question why their superior officers wanted to have a private conversation inside of an elevator.

"Ryuichi Sakuma was hitting on you." Adam made an incredulous expression, what sincerely offended Tatsuha. He was a handsome man and did well socially with men and women alike, so what was the problem to have caught Ryuichi Sakuma's attention? As reading the question on the Captain's face, Hope continued. "Rock star, famous in all planet Earth, going to a big tour across the Universe. Practically a music legend, that Ryuichi Sakuma."

"I know how important he is, Hope." Tatsuha grumbled, pressing again the emergency button and making the lift go back to its course. A minute later the door opened on the deck where the superior officers' cabins were.

"Do you also remember he was your crush when you were a child?" Adam provoked while he watched Tatsuha put his access code in the keyboard beside the Captain's cabin's door and the same open with a hiss. Without waiting for an invitation, he followed the Captain into the cabin and waited for the door to close to keep on with their conversation. "And you just ignored him." He finished with a surprised tone and Tatsuha let out a long and tired breath.

"This was ten years ago. This crush was ten years ago. I was a child back then, childish crushes pass after some time."

"I know Tatsuha. But the irony is too good to be left behind." Tatsuha laughed.

It was true. Years ago he would give an arm and two legs to even have a glance of Ryuichi's blue eyes on him. Nowadays... Well, nowadays the singer stopped beside him, touched his arm and the only emotion Tatsuha felt was surprise for haven't notice the other man presence inside his personal space and see that Ryuchi was hitting on him. What were Ryuichi's intentions? If the singer wanted another name to add in his dating notebook, he could look in another place. Tatsuha was in his work space and wouldn't go so low just for a one night stand (even though he desperately needed it after three months in Space without long shore leaves on land). In one week Ryuichi would leave and Tatsuha would stay there with a guilt conscience and under the accusing stare of his entire crew for have done something so lame. So no, whatever was Sakuma's game, the singer could forget about it.

Besides, he had Tohma to take in consideration. His brother-in-law would skinned him alive if Tatsuha even think to have anything with Tohma's precious 'chicken of gold eggs'.

"Are you not curious? Not even a little bit to know how would be?

"How would be what?" Tatsuha asked when he sat on his single bed to take out his boots. "Sleep with Ryuichi Sakuma?"

"People say he is half taurian and the rumors are that the sex with them is something unforgettable."

"Half of the world is curious about how would be to screw Ryuichi Sakuma, with him being half taurian, half orion, half whatever. So, obviously, I wouldn't be different. But if I _want_ to sleep with him... Well, this is another question."

"Can I know why?"

"Because contrary of what everybody thinks, I also want my suburban house with a front yard, white fence, a dog to play and somebody to share with me all this. So, obviously, I won't have any of this with someone that a lot of people call: The God of the Music."

"I didn't know you were a romantic guy, Tatsuha." Tatsuha rolled his eyes and glared at his friend.

"You, better than anyone, know how much I can be _romantic_." And Adam did know, but this story wasn't worth to remember. Not at that time.

"As you wish Captain." Hope finished the conversation, gave to Tatsuha a respectful salute and left the Captain's cabin. As soon as the door closed with a hiss after Adam's departure, Tatsuha sighed, opening the bedside table's drawer and taking from inside of it a small velvet box, opening and picking with his fingertips the ring made of white gold. A ring where inside of it had an inscription saying only one thing:

_Tatsuha & Alyssa forever_


	6. Chapter 5

**CHAPTER 5**

To find out what the Captain was doing and where he was inside the ship wasn't a very hard job for Ryuichi. Just one trip to the mess hall – the officer's hall was given to the bands so they could have their meals in peace, but when Ryuichi found out that none of the said officers used it he refused to do the same – anyway, just one trip to the mess hall, where he promptly found a table to sit with his breakfast, to Ryuichi be suddenly surrounded by the crew with them asking for autographs, photos or giving the singer praises. And between a flash and signatures, Sakuma used all his charm to discover more things about Tatsuha's routine and almost made a victory dance where he was sat when a lieutenant said:

"I think the Captain is at this moment in the engine room doing his biweekly inspection."

Now all Ryuichi had to do was to find out where the engine room was located inside the ship. Something that wasn't so hard to discover with all the on board computers in the corridors always ready to inform the fastest way to the places and where were the people in the ship. So that was why ten minutes later he saw himself walking through a maze of tubes, stairs, engines and connections which were the _Thunderbird_'s heart, with a big smile blossoming on his face when he spotted his prey hunched over a control panel with another officer with whom Tatsuha was discussing some technicalities.

"Wow! I never thought that so much was needed to make a ship fly." Ryuichi commented when he got closer to the duo and like he had received an electrical shock, Tatsuha straight up and turned with narrowed eyes to look at the singer.

"Mr. Sakuma, what are you doing here? This area is forbidden to civilians."

"I thought that you had given us free pass to explore the ship. At least that was what you said to Shuichi and Eiri last night." Ryuichi said with a smirk, ignoring the death glare that Tatsuha was throwing at him.

"Explore places whose the access are permitted to the public. Which isn't the case at this moment. Mr. Sakuma, I will have to ask for an officer to escort you out of here."

"And this officer would be you, Captain?" Ryuichi couldn't stop himself. Seduction was in his DNA and after what he said, the Chief Engineer Officer, Bradley Thompson, let out a low whistle when he saw Tatsuha's body tense. Ryuichi Sakuma didn't know that he just nudged the tiger with a short branch.

"Lieutenant Dias?" Tatsuha's voice seemed blocked in his throat and the desire to drag Ryuichi out of there by the singer's hair was enormous, but he wouldn't do this in the presence of his subordinates.

Who that flamboyant rock star thought he was? It was one thing for Ryuichi to hit on him in the officer's hall, having only the Uesugi family and their friends as witnesses, another thing was for the singer to be doing this in the open, in his work space and in front of the crew under Tatsuha's command. It was humiliating.

"Sir?" Lieutenant Dias showing up beside Tatsuha was the only thing that stopped the Captain to put Ryuichi inside of a scape pod and exile him in the first planet he saw.

"Please, escort Mr. Sakuma back to his cabin."

"Are you restraining me to my cabin, Captain?" Ryuichi mocked the other man and this time Bradley let out a loud whistle. The singer was bold.

Bradley attended the Academy with Tatsuha even if the Captain, at the time, was two years below him, but when both met each other soon they became friends. And one thing Thompson knew: it doesn't matter how easy going Tatsuha was, even then he was a perfectionist. A man to whom was given the command of a ship with a number over six hundred people as its crew. Men, women and aliens whom even being capable officers, in a moment of crises would look for their Captain for support. And the Captain knew how heavy such responsibility was and didn't like anyone from outside messing with the perfect balance that the _Thunderbird_'s crew reached under his command.

"It will be necessary, Mr. Sakuma?" Tatsuha asked in a dry tone, the same voice he used when he wanted to be listened without being questioned and Ryuichi only answered him with a weak no. "Good. Lieutenant Dias, carry on." Uesugi ordered and turned away from the singer at the same time that the lieutenant went to Ryuichi's side and asked him in a low voice for the man to follow him.

"For a moment I thought that you would rip his head out." Bradley said after Sakuma and Dias left the engine room. He also knew that Tatsuha's patience was very short. "And why the hell Ryuichi Sakuma was doing hitting on you?"

"Why everybody thinks to be impossible for someone like Ryuichi Sakuma be interested in me?"

"Because you are like water and wine, vinegar and oil? Completely different and can't mix in any way?"

"What he wants doesn't matter. What I want to know is what the hell did you do to my propulsion engines."

**oOo**

"Tohma!" Someone calling his name was all the warning the keyboardist had before a hand close painful on his wrist and pull the blond into a vacated conference room, letting him go so abruptly after that that Tohma almost stumbled on his own feet.

Seguchi turned on his heels to see who was his attacker only to discover that it was Tatsuha whom was closer to let fire out of his ears.

"What Sakuma wants? To destroy my career?" Tatsuha screeched like an angry cat and Tohma wanted to knock himself out with the first solid thing he was capable to find. And look at that, there was a metal table inside the room. That would do.

"What did he do this time?" Tohma asked with a groan, already afraid to hear the answer.

"Should I do a summary or say every point in the long list of Sakuma's indiscretions?" Tatsuha growled and Tohma groaned again. "Get into forbidden places for civilians, hit on the Captain in front of his lower officers and follow him like a damn shadow and do the outrageous thing that was ask him to a date in the middle of the mess hall during the lunch. Where half of my crew was. I always knew that Sakuma had a loose screw inside his brain, so if you don't put a stop on this I'll maroon him in the next star that we pass by."

Tohma knew that Tatsuha's level of frustration was high just because along all the Captain explanation he hadn't raised his voice once. And this was another Uesugi trait: when they are furious they usually make a scene. When they are boiling with rage and planning your death and the hide of the body, they would say everything to you in a very calm and cold voice. And this was very dangerous.

"I think you already noticed that Ryuichi is on you."

"Hard to not notice it. Not when he seems to come out of thin air wherever I am."

"Funny how years ago the things would be different, huh?" Tatsuha glared at Tohma.

"Don't come to tell me now that karma is making itself known, Seguchi. You acted like a damn impenetrable steel wall between Sakuma and I, stopping any chance for me to meet him. My teenager adoration was restricted to shows, videos and any other thing that I could put my hands on. But Sakuma, he's stalking me in my work place and this no professional wouldn't take." Seguchi knew that Tatsuha was right and he didn't want to cause more trouble that they already were causing to the younger man.

"I'll talk to him."

"Please do."

"But I can't promise anything." Tatsuha growled. "Ryuichi is very stubborn and when he put his eyes on someone he will do anything to have them, until the moment he will get tired and throw them out. It was like this with his others lovers..."

"It won't be like that with me, Tohma. I'm not an object, a thing, and I not even inclined to be another one in Ryuichi Sakuma's long list of lovers. If he wants a Starfleet's officer to add in his list, he'll have to look for another idiot. This one here is out of the market."

"I'll do my best."

"Do the impossible." Tatsuha ordered and Tohma snorted. He wasn't one of Tatsuha's officers, but he wouldn't remind the other man of this right now, not when the Captain was trembling with contained rage.

So with nod, Tatsuha said goodbye to Tohma and went to the room's door only to grumble when the same opened to show Ryuichi's surprised expression and by his position the singer seemed to be ready to ring the door's bell.

"What are you doing here?" Tatsuha's voice was colder than the Arctic's icy wind.

"I was..." Ryuichi started to explain himself when he was brusquely interrupted by Tohma's hand over his mouth. Tatsuha glared at both of them and when he passed by the two musicians to leave the room and threw a long warning look in Tohma's direction, making the blond keyboardist give a weak smile to his brother-in-law before he pulled Sakuma into the room and locked the door.

"Did you lose your mind?" Seguchi growled when they finally were alone.

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"You don't? Do you know why I was here with Tatsuha? He was demanding that I put some leash on you to stop you to follow him around like a lost dog."

"I didn't know that he had this kind of fetish." Ryuichi smirked while he sat at the table.

"I'm not kidding Ryuichi!" Tohma screamed, slamming his hands on the table's surface. "What you are doing is out of line and totally disrespectful."

"Come on, just because I'm flirting with him I don't think..."

"You are hitting on a Starfleet Captain inside the ship that he commands, under the eyes of his subordinates. This is, at least, humiliating. How would you feel if a stranger started to flirt with you in your work place?" Tohma tried to reach his friend's good sense. He knew that Ryuichi was a professional when on a stage, in a music studio or in front of the cameras, never letting his personal life affect his career. So he would understand Tatsuha's dilemma. At least it was what Tohma hoped.

"Well, putting in that way."

"And besides, he is not interested in you."

"Who said that?"

"The man who is one step closer to maroon you into a star if you keep bothering him. So I think that this is a big clue of his feelings towards you."

"You said he was my fan."

"_Was_ Ryuichi, meaning he isn't anymore." Tohma sighed a tired sigh and pulled a chair, sitting across his friend. "I don't understand why this suddenly obsession for Tatsuha. You are acting the same way Shuichi acted..." Ryuichi looked away from Tohma, staring at a painting which was in one of the room's walls. Seguchi frowned when he saw his friend's reaction. "You're acting the same way Shuichi acted when he met Eiri: persistent, without limits and doing anything and beyond to win Eiri's affection... Ryuichi?"

Tohma narrowed his eyes in his friend's direction.

"Is there something you need to tell me?" Sakuma's cheeks gained a brilliant red color and his eyes went to his hands resting on his knees.

"You know that Shuichi is a taurian like me, don't you? His grandmother was an immigrant from Tauron". Tohma suspected that. After all, the physical resemblance between Shuichi and Ryuichi was a big indication, maybe both was even from the same clan. And for a man of thirty one years old, Shuichi still looked like the nineteen year boy who signed a big contract with the famous NG Records.

"Yes, so?" Ryuichi gulped.

"We are famous for being vain, for like to flirt and be typical Don Juans... But tell me something Tohma, have you ever seen any taurian, after they marry, cheat on their spouse or look to another person with amorous intentions?" Now that Seguchi think about it, no.

Ryuichi's mother was very in love with the singer's father and very devoted to him and the same happened to Shuichi and Eiri. Even being so indifferent, even with everything that Eiri did or did not, even then Shindou still was with the writer and very much in love with him. To everybody's surprise.

"No."

"That's because when we find our perfect match, our mate, to them we'll be faithful until our death or their death or both. And when we find them we do everything to have them."

"Please, don't tell me..." Please, please, Tohma didn't want to hear it. Ryuichi could have done anything but that.

"When I shook Tatsuha's hand on the day we met, I felt the connection. The Universe stopped and started to move again in a second and a spark ran all through my body. All my being vibrates wanting to be with him, wanting his attention."

"For everything that is holy, Ryuichi! Why Tatsuha?"

"It's not something we choose." Ryuichi raised his head, looking directly into his friend's eyes. "It's just happens."

"And now you're stalking him like a bitch in heat."

"TOHMA!"

"It's what it seems to him!"

"I can't help it, my instincts force me to claim him as my mate."

"So tell your instincts to take a cold shower because all that it's doing is pushing Tatsuha away from you."

"Really?" Ryuichi's shoulders slumped and he got such a lost expression on his face that Tohma pitied him.

"Ryuichi, if you really are telling me the truth..."

"Of course I'm telling you the truth. A perfect match is a very serious subject for the taurians. Just because we act like we don't give a damn to the world it doesn't mean that we are so shallow about feelings." Tohma didn't doubt that, because he always thought that all the peace, love and sex from the taurians made them an alien version of the hippies.

"Okay, so if the thing is so serious as you say, you'll have to look for another way to approach Tatsuha, because what you are doing won't work."

"Why not? It worked for Shuichi."

"Eiri is emotionally problematic. When Shuichi appeared in his life like a summer storm and shook all his foundations, Eiri's barriers were too weak for him to fight back. Tatsuha, however, is different. I can say that of all Uesugi siblings, he is the only one who became the most normal of them. So if you want to do this you'll have to know him before you try anything. Really know him."

"And how do I do that?"

"Research."

"How? Ask about him to his siblings with whom he hadn't spoken to in ten years? Or you, the only one with whom he did keep contact?"

"No. My contact with Tatsuha was always short, only some small notes telling me he was all right. I would suggest Commander Hope."

"Commander Hope?"

"The First Officer is the Captain's right arm, his reason, his conscience, his confessor."

"Very poetic." Ryuichi said with sarcasm and an eyeroll.

"And the fact that Hope is Tatsuha's best friend since the Academy would help a lot in your plans." Now Tohma was saying something useful, in Ryuichi's opinion.

"So Hope and I have a date and a very long conversation waiting for us."

Because if the traditional Taurian courting way wasn't working, Ryuichi would have to change the rules of the game. But rest assured that at the end of the week, Tatsuha would be his or his name wasn't Ryuichi Sakuma.


	7. Chapter 6

**AN: **_I just wanted to say that English isn't my first language and I have a problem with trust. Meaning that I don't trust other people to beta my work. I try to fix the mistakes but, sometimes, it escapes my watchful eyes. So be patience with me, okay? Thanks._

* * *

**CHAPTER 6**

"Let me see if I got this right: you want to know more about our Captain." Adam questioned Ryuichi with an arched eyebrow while the singer looked at him with a hopeful expression. Sakuma had approached the Commander earlier in the mess hall asking for a private moment and now was looking at the officer with puppy dog eyes. "Is this serious?"

"Why would I joke about this?"

"Why would you be serious about this? You are Ryuichi Sakuma and Tatsuha, well, he is Tatsuha." Adam spoke like the Captain had nothing special in him and Ryuichi made a face. Tatsuha was special, at least for him, and the singer wouldn't admit anybody else saying differently.

"There is nothing wrong with Tatsuha!"

"I agree. What is wrong is a rock star showing a romantic interest in him."

"Why?" Ryuichi asked, a little bit confused. He was a simple mortal, even with his fame reaching beyond the Universe, but he still had needs like everybody else. Like any other human being, or half human being.

"Because you two are so different that is not even funny."

"This is not what I heard from Shuichi and Tohma. When Tatsuha was younger..."

"When he was younger, Mr. Sakuma. Tatsuha isn't a child anymore, and I understand that to his family this is a difficult concept to accept because the last time they saw him he was barely legal. But now what we have is a grown up man who travels across the Space, fought many battles and was trained to keep his head on his shoulders when under pressure. And what about you? You live to entertain people with your music. To make the crowd go wild. Tatsuha can't go wild, can't lose control, because this mean to lose the lives of hundreds of people under his command. He was your biggest fan when he was a child? Yes, so what? I also had my idols when I was younger. Idols who nowadays I wouldn't look twice if I cross with them in the streets."

"What are you saying? That Tatsuha is too good for me?"

"What I'm saying is that any relationship between you two is a recipe for disaster."

"How can you be so sure? Are you some kind of a psych?"

"I'm realistic."

"But not romantic from what I'm seeing."

"You want romance? How about this? I tell you everything that I know about Tatsuha: his likes and dislikes, plans for the future and his career and you use this on your favor and plan something to lure him. Maybe a dinner for two to apologize for your yesterday's indiscretions. You gonna act like a grown up man, control all your charm and at the dinner's end Tatsuha will see you in another light and will forgive you because he is cool like that. Then you'll see in this your opportunity to keep courting him, firstly acting like a friend so you won't scare him. Then when you realize you'll be spending all Tatsuha's free time together and he'll start to like you in a different way, not that teenager's crush he had, but something more mature and when you see, your relationship will have evolved from a with no attachment kisses to kisses full of promises and end with you both naked and moaning under the sheets."

Well, it wasn't a bad idea, Ryuichi thought with a smile.

"But then the week will end, we'll arrive on T-003 and you and your friends are gonna do your show and the _Thunderbird _will continue its voyage. Because that is what will happen: we will go on under the Starfleet's orders, traveling across the Space, and you'll go on with your tour."

"It's not like that."

"It isn't? Tell me in what moment, any moment, you would have time to see each other again? Tatsuha won't give up of his career in the Fleet because of you Mr. Sakuma. He fought hard to be where he is today and with half of our armada down because of Nero's attack, we are spending more time patrolling the Space then down on Earth because we still don't have enough ships to rotate between the quadrants. And you? Are you going to leave your musical career to enlist in the Fleet? I think is a little too late for that."

"Well... technically..."

"I know, your taurian blood make you still apt to get into the Starfleet, but will you want to do this? I had a girlfriend who was a Nittle Grasper's fan and went to one of your concert with her. I saw you on the stage Mr. Sakuma, your face when you are singing makes clear that you love what you do, that music is your life and that you will keep writing and singing until the end of your days. So don't try to fool me saying that you would leave everything for Tatsuha."

"Tatsuha won't be in the command of a starship forever."

"But he'll be for a long time. And will you wait? If you want to wait. Because is also hard to believe that in three days you fell in love for the Captain. Fell hard enough to do crazy things for him in the name of love."

"It' complicate." Ryuichi lowered his head, trying to hide his reddening cheeks.

"Ah, the said 'taurian's mate'." Sakuma raised his head in a snap when he heard Adam's words.

"How do you know this?"

"I know about things that would surprise you. And I also know that taurians don't have only one mate. There are a great number of them across the Universe and when you find one of them to them you are faithful until the end of your or their lives, whichever comes first. And if your mate dies first, there will be others to fill the void."

"You speak like it is something simple."

"And it's not?"

"No! Before Tatsuha I never met a mate and now that I found him, it doesn't matter if I cross paths with others, he'll always be my first choice. As long as Tatsuha is alive, my mind, body and soul will only recognize him as mate and won't want anyone else but him. And my instincts will scream to have him and you can't deny me this right." Ryuichi said in a hysterical tone.

He heard so many stories from his grandmother, with most of them bordering the fairy-tale side in a way that made him laugh for hours. But now, now that he was living the situation, he didn't think this was so funny anymore. And the idea of not having Tatsuha almost gives him a panic attack.

"True, I can't. But you also can't deny me the right to protect a friend from a broken heart." Ryuichi glared at Adam, feeling there was something more in his words.

"Tatsuha had his heart broken before?"

"Not exactly."

"So? Is this the kind of story that is only his to tell?"

"The story is not a secret to anyone, Sakuma. Everyone in the Fleet knows, it's in his public records."

"If it is nothing traumatic..."

"It's traumatic. Nero's attack made a lot of people loose friends, family, I lost pals from the Academy because of a bat shit crazy romulan." Ryuichi gulped.

"And Tatsuha? Who he lost?" The singer asked with trepidation.

"His wife." Something cold seemed to slide down Ryuichi's chest and stop inside his stomach when he heard Hope's words.

"Tatsuha was married?"

"And very happy. But his wife was posted on _Farragut_, one of the ships destroyed on the attack while Tatsuha was in the _Akira_ with the rest of the fleet in the Laurentian system. Become _Thunderbird_'s Captain was what helped him to leave his mourning, this and other factors. I don't believe he will leave everything behind because of you. And I believe he still loves his deceased wife."

"Meaning: I don't have a freaking chance."

"Maybe, maybe not, but I wouldn't bet on that."

"So tell me something: as a friend, don't you want to see Tatsuha happy?"

"Yes."

"You don't think that I will make him happy?"

"I have my doubts." Adam crossed his arms over his chest and looked at Ryuichi's determined expression with raised eyebrows. It seemed that not even the information about the dead wife would deter the singer from his objective. Hope didn't know if it was really love, obsession or plain stupidity.

"You'll never have your answers if you don't let me try."

Okay, Ryuichi was partly right, Hope wanted to see Tatsuha's happiness. Especially because he was there when the Captain heard the news about Alyssa's death. He was a witness of Tatsuha's pain. So excuse him if he was still a little bit doubtful to let Ryuichi be the one responsible for Tatsuha's heart. But he also could be wrong. This, only the time would tell.

"What would you like to know, Sakuma?" Ryuichi gave to the First Officer a big smile full of happiness before he started to list all he would like to know about Captain Uesugi.

**oOo**

"You." The dry tone was what welcomed Ryuichi after the cabin's door opened, showing the level of frustration Tatsuha was feeling towards the singer right at that moment. The same frustration Ryuichi was ignoring while he was enjoying the vision in front of his eyes.

Uesugi wasn't wearing the Captain's golden shirt, only the black regulation shirt that seemed to have been drawn around his muscles. The black pants also let very little for the imagination and the barefoot add some charm to the picture, what made Ryuichi want to jump on the Captain, but was able to stop himself in time.

"Can we talk?" Sakuma was able to find his voice in some dark hole inside his short circuiting brain, together with a little of self control to keep going with his plan. It wouldn't make sense, after his conversation with Commander Hope, to screw up everything just because he was feeling like a hormonal teenager.

Tatsuha gave to the singer a long look, thinking if the proposition was worth his time, and after two minutes in silence he finally took a side step in a mute invitation for Ryuichi to enter.

The moment he entered the Captain's cabin, Sakuma looked with a little bit of curiosity around the place, trying to find in the spartan decoration some of Tatsuha's personality.

The uniform's shirt was over the bed. There was a PADDs' pile on the work table and beside it were three empty coffee mugs. Real mugs made from plastic and with some drawings on the surface. There was also a shelf above the bed with books, the paper and with colored covers kind of books, all with famous titles. An old digital clock was on the bedside table but what caught Ryuichi's attention was the electronic picture frame. It was a small squared LCD screen where pictures were passing with all the photos having Tatsuha as the main theme together with some other people who were probably some friends from the Academy.

But also, all the photos had as a common factor, besides Tatsuha, a pretty brunette girl with long wavy hair, small freckles on the face and big green eyes.

Ryuichi assumed that that was Tatsuha's dead wife and with that the singer felt another ice cube go down his chest and find home in his stomach.

"If you came here only to appreciate my quarters..." Tatsuha's voice made Ryuichi jump in his place and looked at the man who had his arms crossed over his chest and was still close to the cabin's door. With a brief glance, the singer saw another picture appear on the LCD screen. This time it was a photo of Tatsuha wearing the Starfleet's dress uniform with the woman in a traditional white dress.

Ryuichi gulped when he realized what that picture meant. It was Tatsuha's wedding day.

"I didn't know that you were married." Smooth Sakuma, really smooth, Ryuichi thought.

Tatsuha arched both his eyebrows and looked from Ryuichi's face to the picture frame that the singer was looking at, realizing how the other had reached that conclusion.

"If I knew I wouldn't..."

"You wouldn't what? Hit on me?" Well, yes, was Ryuichi's thoughts. Even if all his being starts to scream because he was denying his mate, taurians had principles. If the perfect match is already claimed by another, taurians wouldn't be able to undo this union. Said union was sacred to the Tauron race and it doesn't matter if was only a family bond or a romantic bond.

"Yes." Ryuichi said out loud what he only thought before. "And where is she?" He asked in his best uninterested voice, even if he already knew the answer.

Tatsuha glared at Ryuichi, thinking that all that conversation and the singer's abnormal behavior meant that the older man was plotting something, but the Captain decided to archive this information to use it later when the opportunity come up.

"Dead." It was Tatsuha's calm answer.

Obviously that Alyssa's death had shook Tatsuha's foundations because nobody with feelings would be unmoved by the death of a beloved one. Was it hard to get over it? Sure it was. But his job and friends helped him.

Tatsuha met Alyssa in the Academy and both had as priority in their career be posted in some starship. So they knew that the profession they had chosen was a high risk job and they also knew that the possibility of them not working in the same ship was high. Tatsuha was training to be a commanding officer while Alyssa was training to be a security officer and by Starfleet's rules, they usually avoided to put relatives or spouses in the same ship when one of them would be the commanding officer of the other.

And it was because of that that Alyssa and Tatsuha always knew that they wouldn't work together and would have to keep a long distance relationship. They also knew that the probabilities to die on mission were high. However, they married even with all these cons and promised to each other, besides the usual marriage vows, that if the possibility to grow old together never happen, that they would cry for the lost of their spouse and when the mourning period passed they would move on with their lives.

The idea was good in theory, but when Tatsuha had to use it in the real life, it was harder than he thought. But he got over it. The pain of the lost diminished with time and sometimes the depression liked to give him a hello on the special dates for the couple, but he still was young, had a lot to live, a career and Alyssa would never like to see him crying for her. Because if this happen, Tatsuha was sure that she would come back from the dead only to kick his ass.

Besides, Tatsuha wasn't like his brother Eiri, he knew how to leave the past in the past because there was another factor in the equation that should be always remembered. Something that was so important that made him get up and keep going.

"I'm sorry."

"Why? It wasn't you who killed her."

"Yes, but..."

"Formalities are really the most idiotic thing invented by the human race." Tatsuha interrupted Ryuichi, going to the picture frame and grabbing it, and smiled when the photo of his wedding appeared on the frame.

"You're right."

Ryuichi felt like something had stuck in his throat when he saw the sweet smile that the Captain gave to the woman in the picture. Adam was right, Tatsuha still loved his deceased wife. So how could he compete against that? How Ryuichi could have, in five days, the same loving expression that Captain was giving to the picture directed to him?

"But even then, it must be hard."

"It always is hard." Tatsuha put the frame back on the bedside desk. "There isn't one single person emotionally capable who never had cried when a beloved one die."

"You look fine to me. I mean, for someone who lost your beloved."

"It was two years ago. I can't keep crying about it forever because it won't bring Alyssa back. And I have other things to worry about." Ryuichi frowned when he heard that.

"Your crew." He guessed. Captains had big responsibilities and Adam had said that for Tatsuha, get the _Thunderbird'_s command helped the man to get over the lost of his wife.

"That too." What? Ryuichi's curious mind was dying to knew more information about the other man.

Commander Hope had told to Ryuichi stories about Tatsuha's Academy's days, but he didn't say anything important about Alyssa and the Captain's relationship. Adam only said that his best friend love life wasn't something he liked to discuss with people who had the intention too woo him.

Tatsuha only looked at Ryuichi for a while without saying anything, seeing the curiosity in the singer's face, and with a smile he pointed to the picture frame on the bedside table.

Sakuma's eyes went to the LCD screen where now the picture had changed for a new one. In it was a middle aged couple, with big smiles on their faces, and in the woman's lap was a little girl. She probably was two or three years old and had long dark hair, a chubby and cute face and big green eyes.

"She is..."

"Her name is Paige."

Ryuichi wanted to scream. A dead wife he could deal with, but the woman left permanent memories in Tatsuha's life. There was a child who connected the Captain to the woman and this only turned the things a little more complicated.

"But is not about my family that you want to talk, right Mr. Sakuma?"

"Technically, no. But you started to talk about them so I just followed the flow."

Tatsuha laughed.

He had nothing to hide or to be ashamed of. So, because of this, talk about his family was something he liked to do, especially if the subject was his daughter. Anybody who asked anyone from the crew something about the Captain's private life would hear about these details. After all, from two to two weeks the _Thunderbird_ gets close enough to the Earth to establish contact, allowing the Captain to chat with his in-laws and Paige, who always smiles brilliantly to Tatsuha, like a new born star, every time she sees her daddy.

"But what really brings you here Mr. Sakuma?"

"First, could you stop with the formalities? Mr. Sakuma makes me feel... old." Tatsuha arched one eyebrow to him. "Okay, in human years I'm a middle aged man, but do I look like I'm forty?" Well, Tatsuha had to admit that the singer looked like he was only two years older than him.

"Sakuma then."

"Ryuichi."

"Don't push it."

"Okay. Second, I'd like to apologize."

"Apologize?"

"Yes, for my attitudes yesterday and today."

"Meaning, you following me like a shadow all day, messing with my job and putting your life in danger when you went in into forbidden places to civilians."

"Yes. But, you know, is part of who I am. It is in my genes. You are a very interesting person and I wanted to get close to you. Besides, taurians flirt with everyone, it is in our nature. So, do the math."

"It really is a weird way to get closer to someone. It was like that when you met Tohma?"

Ryuichi laughed.

Basically, yes. But Tohma never was a small fish in a big ocean, he already born dangerous like a shark. And since he was a child he was always a manipulator bastard. So when he was hit on by Ryuichi's lame pick up lines, he acted like it was a normal thing and said "no" to the other boy with half a dozen of well placed words. And was like that that the most dysfunctional friendship Ryuichi ever had was born. However, Tatsuha was a special case, but he didn't need to know this at the moment.

"I'm forgiven then?"

"Will you stop to hit on me?"

"I'll try. Flirt is something natural to me and sometimes I do it without even realizing. If this happen, you let me know. But I really like to know you better Tatsuha."

"The irony is hilarious."

"Why?"

"Because years ago I would give anything to have you like this, two steps away from me, wanting to know me."

"Oh! Tohma told me. You used to be my fan." Tatsuha wasn't surprised that Seguchi had told Ryuichi about this. After all, it wasn't a secret to anyone and Adam liked to joke about it sometimes. "But, apparently, you are not anymore." Tatsuha smiled.

"It was a phase that already passed."

"But I have fans in all ages."

"Are you feeling your ego deflate just because you couldn't keep a fan interested for a long time?" Tatsuha joked, pulling one of the chairs from his work desk and offering it to Ryuichi to sit. Sakuma saw in this gesture a progress because Tatsuha not only hadn't kicked him out of the cabin after his apologies, but he was also inviting him to a conversation.

With his heart jumping inside his chest because of this small victor, Ryuichi sat, being followed by Tatsuha who sat on another chair in front of him.

"Yes."

"I still like the Nittle Grasper's music, but I don't follow anymore all the words printed about you or the singles' debut."

"My ego recovered partially after hearing this, but it still is very depressed with the news." Tatsuha laughed again and Ryuichi's heart jumped one more time because of it. It was the second or third time that the Captain was laughing, a real laugh, because of the singer. And Ryuichi was falling more in love with him every minute passed.

"If I say that I liked the last movie you made, will your ego get better?"

"Perhaps. But it will need more flattering to finally get to the top again."

"I didn't know it was so big." Uesugi said, amused with their conversation. "And I never thought that this day would ever happen. Me, face to face with Ryuichi Sakuma and having a normal conversation with him. I'm shocked."

"Why?"

"Because you are very different from what I thought."

"Different?"

"Well, for starts: where is Kumaguro?"

"He was retired years ago, nobody told you?"

"You just stopped carry him everywhere and nobody said anything?"

"No. It was gradually. Bit by bit I stopped to take him to all the places and in the end I stopped for good."

"And why did you start to carry him with you in the first place?"

"My mother gave Kumaguro to my as a company and lucky charm when I told her that I intended to follow a career in the music business. She is a researcher, you know? She has a PhD in culture and living beings behavior. This was one of the reasons she went to Earth. She is fascinated by human behavior and their uncountable cultures. She said that with my dedication and talent I would reach the top, I would be famous and with that I would be idolized. It's the human nature magnify the celebrities and turn them into gods. Kumaguro should also be a remembrance of where I came from. Every time I did something wrong or the fame started to affect me, I would look at him and remember my mother's words. But now, after such a long time, I'm already used to this celebrity world and I don't need him anymore to bring me back to the reality."

"And what about the childish attitude?"

"Well, I was childish. When the Nittle Grasper started I was only eighteen years old. I was like a big baby and a little bit overwhelmed with the entertainment industry. But after a while I was stigmatized with that childish image, even if I had grew up, and Tohma told me to keep with it because it helped with the band's popularity. And then people started to expect that attitude from me."

"And do you keep with it? It's been years that I don't follow anything about NG, so I wouldn't know if the Sakuma with whom I'm talking now it's the same to the public eyes."

"He is the same, you can bet on it. The time came when I had to stop with the act because I was getting old and people think it's ridiculous a forty years old man act like a child. I must confess that I was relieved. Go back to my childhood one or another time is good, it helps to relieve the stress. But act like a child all the time is very tiresome."

"And I must confess that I prefer the present Sakuma than the past Sakuma."

"Can I ask you a personal question?" Ryuichi asked, feeling motivated by the conversation that they were having.

In a few minutes he discovered things about Tatsuha and said things to him that normally would take months to be told. It was wonderful to know how easy it was to talk to the other man just because he didn't look at Ryuichi with adoration shining in his dark eyes because of Sakuma's fame. On the contrary, Tatsuha looked to Ryuichi like he was just another person in the crowd and talked to him like they were equals, and this was awesome. The only people who treated him like that was his family and close friends (a.k.a Tohma and Noriko). That was why he didn't make a lot of friends outside the band because people never were capable to see beyond the great Ryuichi Sakuma. But Tatsuha wasn't like the others and Ryuichi was loving every moment.

"After so many?" Tatsuha said with amusement and Ryuichi gave him a small smile.

"Why did you leave Japan?" Tatsuha frowned and Sakuma worried that he finally had crossed the line with his question and ruined everything he achieved until that moment.

"I don't think we are close enough to have this question answered."

"Sorry. I didn't mean..." Ryuichi said, a little bit depressed.

"I never said it won't be answered, just not now." This made Sakuma's heart jump with hope. "Let's just say that I was young, made a lot of mistakes and one of them had disastrous consequences."

"Consequences that still affect your life?"

"No. The problem was solved, but, obviously, it left its marks."

"Like the fact that you left and spent years without talking to your family."

"It was necessary."

"And someday will you tell me why?"

"Someday."

"Then I'll wait anxiously for this day."

Ryuichi smiled because he knew when this day comes, it would mean that Tatsuha and him would be close enough to be great friends.

And, maybe, something more.


	8. Chapter 7

**CHAPTER 7**

"It seems that today is the day for the surprise visits." It was the first thing Tatsuha said when he opened his cabin's door for the second time in that night and saw Mika standing in front of it. "You came to apologize too?" He joked and Mika only glared at him as an answer.

Tatsuha rolled his eyes and let out a long sigh, taking a step away from the door and allowing Mika to enter the room. He knew that that confrontation would happen sooner or later, he was only surprised that Mika waited a whole day to do it. She probably spent all this time thinking about the past before she came to talk to him.

"So, how can I help you Mrs. Seguchi?"

"Don't sound so happy about my visit." Mika said with a sarcastic tone as soon as she stepped inside the cabin. Her eyes went all around the room until she saw two dirty empty plates and cups on the worktable. "Somebody was here." She said like an accusation and Tatsuha wanted to smack his forehead on the wall. It hadn't even passed 48 hours since Mika returned to his life and she was again being the bossy sister who made his life a hell for all his childhood and teenager years.

"Somebody is always here Mika. This, in case you're wondering, is still the Captain's cabin."

"Very funny. What I'm saying is that somebody was here earlier. Somebody that I know was Ryuichi Sakuma." Tatsuha didn't even questioned her how she knew that. Sakuma left his cabin minutes ago, so the probability of him crossing Mika's path was high.

"Mika, it's late and as you see" Tatsuha pointed to the PADD pile on the table. "I have work to do and my day was very busy and the night was pleasant" he said, remembering his conversation with Ryuichi. Even if they started everything with the wrong foot, their relationship got better after their chat. Sakuma was a funny guy and a pleasant company and after a hard day of work his visit was a good surprise. "until now. And I can foresee a headache if you don't tell me in the next minute why you are here."

"You know why I'm here." Tatsuha groaned and grabbed a chair, sitting on it like a dead weight. This conversation will be a very long one and totally different from the one he had with Sakuma. Mika huffed with Tatsuha's act and sat on the other available chair, glaring at him all the way. "I only want to know why."

"You know why."

"No, I don't. You left without leaving a note, without any explanation, nothing. And Tohma refuses to say anything to me using as an excuse that this matter should be solved between siblings."

"Tohma trying not to be a meddlesome. This is new." Tatsuha mocked.

"Tatsuha!" Mika admonished him, hating the fact that the man she was seeing now, the one who doesn't seem to care about their conversation, reminded her of the irresponsible teenager from years ago. Tohma insisted that Tatsuha had changed, that he was different, that he was a grown up man, but all that Mika saw was the same annoying teenager. He was the same in her eyes.

"My siblings said with all the words that I was not welcome so I decided to took away the disappointment that I was from their sight. And why are you complaining? It was you who said for me to stop to act like a child, to grow up. So I only did what you told me to do."

"I only wanted for you to think in your actions before the consequences turn out to be a disaster, not to ran away from home."

"I didn't run away from home. I was eighteen, what made me legally capable to make my own decisions and I decided to leave."

"It was the coward way out, that what it was!"

"Maybe, but at least it was _my_ decision." Tatsuha accused and Mika blanched.

"What do you mean?"

"You know what I mean."

"Enlighten me."

"You are everything but an idiot. But if you really wanna know, so here we go: I left because I was tired of everybody pretending that I didn't exist to later discover that I was there, that I was an Uesugi too, just because I did something stupid. Then you would come, along with our father, with your bossy way trying to control my life because 'poor Tatsuha he isn't able to make his own decisions. He's too young to know what he wants to do with his life'. And the there was Eiri with his fake moral lessons and all the 'poor me, pity me' vibe while he pretended to not give a damn. And then when I did something really stupid, something that wasn't even my fault, you all decide to say that I should grow up, be responsible, when minutes ago you all thought that was too young to decide anything. It gave me a whiplash. Really. I had an epiphany and decided that the only way for me to be normal was to leave because, really, you were suffocating me."

"You can't be serious." Mika said with an expression that seemed torn between surprise and anger.

"I am. It was the same thing that I said to the Psychologist from the Starfleet in my annual evaluation. He said that I was the first person he met that Freud can't explain. I don't have a mother complex, I have siblings complex. In one moment I was completely rejected by my family and in the next I was under everyone's attention only to hear that I was a deception. The guy was shocked to see that even with me growing up under such pressure I was able to have a strong personality. He believes that my departure was what made me able to finally evolve."

"We are the reason why you ran away?"

"I didn't run. It was a strategic retreating."

"You ran, Tatsuha. Leave without an explanation is ran away. Don't keep contact is ran away."

"I did keep contact."

"With Tohma and even then you asked him to not say anything." She accused and Tatsuha bristled.

"Because I didn't want you to ruin my life!" He got out from the chair with a jump. The Psychologist also said that would come a time when Tatsuha would have to face his problems. Meaning, he would have to talk to his family to finally surpass his complex. And this time was that night.

"We didn't ruin your life!" Mika protested with the same angry tone, getting up from the chair too so she wouldn't have too much disadvantage in the discussion that was about to happen.

"If keep telling yourself this make you sleep better at night, do as you wish. But in the last ten years I was happier than ever away from you than in the eighteen years that I lived with you!"

"Are you trying to tell that the Tatsuha who liked to party, stay away from home for days, disappear at night in the streets of Tokyo, do crazy things to go to a Nittle Grasper concert, pretend to be his own brother to have some advantages, is happy living under military rules? The same Tatsuha who hated any authority figure?" Tatsuha smirked to her. Mika only remembered his flaws, never his qualities. And why would she remember? Perhaps she didn't even know it.

"Yes." He said with conviction and Mika deflated.

"You can't be the same Tatsuha that I knew." He huffed.

"Mika, let's be serious, but I think you never really knew me. You were too busy spoiling Eiri, trying to be the perfect wife to the great Tohma Seguchi, cajoling our dad, to remember that I was there."

"This is not true." She said in a defensive tone. "I took care of you. After our mother died..." Tatsuha laughed a mocking laugh.

"When our mother died you already was eighteen, was already dating Tohma. Two years later you moved to New York with the Nittle Grasper and Eiri. When you came back all that problem with Kitazawa had happened..."

"How do you know about Kitazawa?" Mika gasped and Tatsuha smirked again. Nobody had told to him about what happened to Eiri when they lived in New York, but the good thing about be ignored by your family is that they never pay attention to the people hearing behind the doors.

"Then all your time was for Eiri and trying to be the mediator between him and our father. After that you married Tohma and moved to Tokyo. Eiri left a few years later and I stayed in Kyoto, listening to the old man complaints about how ungrateful Eiri was and how you, his beautiful girl, had left him. So I'm sorry if I don't feel guilt for sending you all to hell. After all, nobody can blame me, right? I had good enough reasons." He finished with a long breath and saw that Mika's face was very white and her eyes were wild open like somebody just slapped her.

"You're lying."

"Believe in what you want Mika. I'm not here to help with your guilt."

"I'm not feeling guilty because I didn't do anything!"

"Exactly."

"What?" She gasped again.

"You _never_ did anything."

"Tatsuha..."

"You know what? Save it. Our differences are so big, our sorrows come from years of unresolved problems, that won't be solved in one night. I'm tired, with a headache thanks to you and after this week is over I'm sure that we won't talk again for a long time. So why bother?"

"Because we still are a family Tatsuha."

"Mika." He sighed, turning in his sister's direction and looking inside her eyes. "I don't know if you are stubborn or really naive, but we stopped being a family the day we buried our mother." Mika's eyes got a shine in them that Tatsuha guessed to be tears. Tears that would never be shed.

That was Mika: always trying to be the strong one, the unbreakable one, even if the world is falling apart around her.

"You're married, have a lovely son, have your life. Eiri has Shuichi, even if he doesn't admit that he needs him. Dad is already resigned to everything and buried himself in his prayers and beliefs. So why do you insist to fix something that can not be fixed?

"Because of you."

"What?"

"You said that each one of us moved on. But what about you?" Tatsuha sighed again.

"You think that I didn't move on?"

"I don't know."

"Mika, look around you. Get into the Starfleet was a last minute decision, but it was the best decision that I ever made. I'm where I want to be, I'm happy here. I have a career, I have friends..."

"A career? You won't be in the Starfleet forever." She raised her hand, stopping Tatsuha to argue against what she said. "I'm not jinxing you. I'm only saying that one day you'll get old, maybe you'll be an Admiral, but then you'll retire and that will be the end of your career. Friends? These come and go, but family always stay." Mika and her attachment to her values and traditions. In this aspect she was very similar to their father.

"Mika..." Tatsuha said in a low voice, like he was about to throw a bomb on her, what probably was the case. "I have a family."

"What?" She gasped and after a few seconds her eyes went large in understanding.

"I have a family, one that I got away from you."

"You have... You..." Mika was speechless and with trembling knees she searched for the closest chair and sat on it. The news were like a punch in her guts. Tatsuha had another family, so this meant... "And where is she?" Mika asked in a whisper and Tatsuha looked away from his sister to the digital frame on the bedside table.

"Alyssa, my wife, died two years ago when the Earth was attacked."

The romulan attack. The Federation hadn't said much about it to the public, only that some romulan that wasn't answering for the Empire destroyed Vulcan and almost destroyed Earth for reasons that only the Starfleet knew.

"Paige, our daughter, lives with my in-laws in Tennessee."

Silence. A long and awkward silence came after Tatsuha's confession, with Mika looking at her baby brother like she was seeing him for the first time.

"Why is she living with your in-laws?" She asked in a way like she was asking about the weather.

"She's only three years old and a fighting ship is not a place to raise a toddler."

"But don't you feel guilt for being away from her? Even now that she lost her mother in such a young age."

"Alyssa and I didn't have plans to stop our careers because of the baby. The idea was that when Paige was a little older we would ask for a transfer to an exploration ship. Said ships have the policy to accept families on board. But then the attacked happened, Alyssa died, the fleet number was diminished and we lost a lot of officers and cadets so the Starfleet had to promote a lot of people to fill the gaps."

Tatsuha took a long breath and kept going.

"When they called me I thought to refuse, but my mother and father-in-law convinced me to accept, supported me saying that it would be great for my career. It was because of this that I studied so much, trained so much and Alyssa would never forgive me if I let this opportunity to pass. They also said that I would regret eventually if I refused, even if I was doing it because of Paige, and that they were there to take care of my daughter so everything would be fine. And until now everything is fine."

He shrugged.

"Do I miss my baby? Yes, so much that I can't even explain, but when I can I always talk to them or I go to visit my family on Earth."

"Your family... Your in-laws and daughter."

"Yes."

"But not your siblings and father."

"Mika, I thought that we already had left this subject behind us."

"It's just..." She averted her eyes for a moment, took a deep breath and returned to look at him. "It's just so hard to admit that you're right."

"About what?"

"I really don't know you." Mika got up from the chair, smoothing her skirt to take away any wrinkle, and went to the door. "I'm gonna let you work." She said when the door hissed open. "Good night Captain." And then she left.

Tatsuha kept looking to the closed door for some minutes, trying to process everything that happened, and when the adrenalin brought by the conversation finally left his body, he let it fall on the closest chair and let out a long sigh. His Psychologist was right: this conversation tired him emotionally, but helped a lot with his problems. And now he could finally move on.

**oOo**

"Do you mind if I sit here?" Adam and Tatsuha turned when they heard the voice and saw Ryuichi Sakuma putting his tray on the table in front of them and sitting on it soon after.

Uesugi and Hope's eyes went all around the mess hall that little by little was getting crowded by the crew who would start the alpha shift and the ones who were leaving the gamma shift. Ryuichi noticed the two officers look, like they were searching for something, before their eyes fell on Ryuichi.

"What?" The singer asked.

"Just for curiosity Sakuma: but the officers' hall wasn't given to the NG and Bad Luck to take theirs meals?" Tatsuha asked with a really curious expression. He remembered that he had offered the hall to assure some privacy for the two bands and their friends and spouses.

"Yes. And we are putting it to a good use, thank you."

"So?" Tatsuha arched one eyebrow because, as far as he knew, Ryuichi had lost himself in the way to the officers' hall or had lost his mind.

"Okay, I'm not using it, I admit. It's just... It's a little lonely there." The Captain's eyebrow was still arched even after Sakuma's answer. "And all right, I thought that after last night I would be welcomed to your company this morning. That we could take our breakfast together."

"Last night?" Adam gave to Tatsuha a look so full of innuendos that the Captain had to restrain himself to not slap his First Officer on the head so he would stop to think perverted thoughts.

"We had a nice conversation last night." Uesugi explained, even if he didn't have to. He was the Captain, he didn't have to justify his actions or what he did in his time off.

"Yes. And I thought that it wouldn't be so bad to repeat the experience." Sakuma said. "Unless that I'm interrupting something. Because if this is the case, I can..." He said, already getting up from his chair and grabbing his tray. He didn't want to push his luck, not after getting so far with Tatsuha last night. He was finally breaking the other man's walls, he didn't want to ruin his hard work.

"No!" Adam almost screamed and this made Ryuichi freeze all his movements. "I mean, of course you can sit with us, we would love your company." Tatsuha looked at Hope in a way like he was asking what his friend smoked that morning. A look that Adam ignored while he offered to Ryuichi a big smile, a smile that said that he knew exactly what the singer was planning.

Sakuma only smiled back and sat again on the chair, starting his breakfast while a comfortable silence fell over them.

"Funny." Ryuichi said after some minutes.

"What's funny?" Tatsuha asked while he was busy reading some documents in his PADD.

Last night he wasn't able to finish half of the work after Mika's visit. The headache that started on the beginning of their conversation turned into a nasty migraine that made Tatsuha want to hide under his bed covers instead of work and sleep for at least twelve hours straight.

"It seems there is a wall between us." Tatsuha look up from the PADD's screen to Ryuichi in front of him. "It's just that yesterday, when I took my breakfast here in the mess hall, a lot of people came to me..." The singer swallowed anything else he was about to say when he saw the Captain sit straighter on his chair and put the PADD on the table, with a displeasure expression in his handsome face.

"I thought that I said to nobody bother them." Uesugi said to Adam who shrugged.

"You can't stop the human curiosity." Hope explained.

"No! No!" Ryuichi promptly interrupted them. He didn't want to cause trouble to anyone. "Nobody bothered me. Yes, they came to me, but they were very polite. They asked for some pictures and autographs and that was it. Nothing that I hadn't dealt before. And even then it was different because there wasn't anyone screaming hysterically or pushing each other. It was very organized and calm. I'm not complaining so you don't have to reprimand anyone."

"If you say so." Tatsuha said and this seemed to calm Ryuichi.

"What I meant to say is that yesterday they came to me to ask for some kind of a souvenir, but today I only feel the eyes on me but nobody is approaching." Ryuichi explained and Adam laughed.

"You're in the Captain's table. No one from the crew is crazy enough to disobey the Captain's orders in front of the Captain. Is suicide." Hope explained and Ryuichi nodded, finding some sense in what he was saying. "Now if you excuse me." Adam got up, grabbing his empty tray. "I have a shift to start. I'll see you in the bridge Captain. Sakuma." He turned and left after his farewell, leaving Ryuichi and Tatsuha alone in the table, with Tatsuha turning his attention back to his PADD.

"So... Yesterday I met Mika after I left your room."

"Hum." It was the only thing that Tatsuha offered as an answer, his attention was still in the PADD.

"I hope that everything is alright. She didn't look too happy when she found out where her lost brother had hide himself in all these years."

"If the Universe doesn't run according to Mika's will, she is never happy."

"I know that Mika is a little bossy..." Tatsuha raised his head and looked at Ryuichi with a

mockery expression.

"A little?"

"Okay, she is totally bossy, but this doesn't mean that she doesn't love you."

"Sakuma, I never doubt of my family's love for me. But love and care are two different things." Tatsuha said with a sigh, putting his PADD on the table. "You came to keep me company or to talk about my family? If it's the second, wonderful way to give me a stomachache so early in the morning. It wasn't enough the migraine that Mika gave me last night, I don't want another pain in the list. Usually I try to avoid to visit the sick bay. Dr. James is a brilliant doctor, but I always thought that she has some loose screws in her head."

"Okay, I'm gonna change the subject. For example, I heard that tomorrow we'll stop at Port 14."

"Yes, there are some supplies that the Fleet wishes that we take to T-003. It's a standard procedure that we make from six to six months."

"So what are the chances of the Captain accompany me to a lunch in the port?"

"Sakuma... You're flirting."

"Sorry. So? Would you like to accompany me?" Tatsuha hesitated a little.

"Why?"

"Why not?"

"If it's company that you want, why not Tohma, Noriko or someone from the Bad Luck?" Ryuichi rolled his eyes.

"Because I already know them. I thought that you were willing to give a chance to us. For us to be friends. I'm speaking the truth when I say that I'm interested in you, that you're a good company. But how can I start to build this friendship if you shut down every suggestion that I make, thinking that I have second intentions?" Tatsuha hesitated a lot longer until he let out a defeated sigh.

"What time would you like to meet for lunch?" He asked and Ryuichi almost made a victory dance.

Progress, _finally_!


End file.
